YOU ARE JOBLESS, I AM JOBLESS

The Beautiful 90s

2011-11-09T17:35:00.002+05:30

“India Shining” and ”Technology at its best” hit the headlines periodically to distract us from 2G/CWG and Gurujis but all said and done, I think the technological improvements, the era of internet and social networking and the mall shopping hullaballoo has taken away some moments of our “lives” that are worth living. I am not saying technology is not important, of course it is. How else would I be expressing myself on this platform today! I am not a big fan of 60s and 70s either when people had to struggle to go to primary school. I consider myself lucky to be born in the 80s to enjoy my childhood in the 90s.
I must say 90s had an extraordinary charm, warmth, enthusiasm and excitement which is missing now and I am sure would have been missing earlier too. I can make this comment based on the picture of life then I have got from my parents and other elder people I have spoken to. Partly we can say liberalization brought some comforts and improved the pace of progress from the 80s to make us happy. Thanks to PVN and MMS for that! We had best of both the worlds during my childhood where we had not moved too far away from the humanness that exists when we are not crowded with machines. At the same time we had the comforts of modern India. Now when I sit to think how our lives have changed in the past 15 years, it is exponential. When I think of it some make me smile, some bring a tear and some make me say “WTH”.
If we consider a 24 hour window and keep a count of number of people we meet and talk to and the number of machines we see, what do you think would rank higher? The computers, the cars and bikes, the TV, the phone, the tablets and what not. We see people more on TV, Websites and pictures than in real.
There was a time when we used to have enough time to talk with family, friends, teachers, relatives. Thanks to the power cuts which made us sit idle and talk , play antakshari or even come out to the streets and socialize with neighbors. Now the UPS has taken away that too! For instance I don’t even know who stays behind the shut doors in my apartment complex. The 24 hours hasn’t changed over the years. It is we who have! Our priorities have!
There was a time when we knew what was for lunch at neighbor’s place. Now we are happy if we could cook lunch at our own home. Fresh vegetable vendors on streets are replaced by frozen ones in the fridge. Fresh hot tasty lunch is replaced by reheated dinner. Thanks to the purchasing power to own a fridge and a microwave as a necessity that was luxury at some point.
The thought of going to a movie or an amusement park would bring so much excitement in my school days. Now going to malls and movies is a weekend routine and anything in abundance loses its value. Rather I don’t remember when was the last time I was excited about something. Nothing is rare for us to wait eagerly for. Even cricket matches occur every week now.
There was a time when festivals meant good food, new clothes and lot of people. Now they are just “Holidays” to relax from the 24X7 running around. Sometimes they are even shifted to make them “Long weekends”.
There was a time when we received letters from relatives and cards from friends and phone calls on birthdays. But now, letters have turned into emails stores on some web servers. Cards have turned into facebook wall wishes and phone calls into template smses. No longer do you have to remember a friend’s birthday to wish. Even if you do, you would not be noticed among 1000s of people who might have automated it.
There was a time when we took snaps, made an album and shared them with family and friends in person pointing who is who, describing the location and telling stories behind the snaps. Now we can click them on and on till we exhaust the memory card and dump them on a hard drive. We do upload on facebook or picasa and let people make sense of it.
Small moments in life like having an ice cream, sharing a joke or an anecdote, playing with friends, chatting over tea and snacks, an evening walk that needs planning now happened so effortlessly those days that I did not know the value then. Now when I think of it spending hours in the traffic, I do feel something is missing in life. We make advertisements out of the missing moments to make business. We have definitely made progress. Just that our soul is left behind.
PS: Somethings never change. We still spend a lot on weddings :D

Fairness for the Fairer Sex

2011-01-27T23:57:00.021+05:30

It was Janmashtami day when the whole household fasted waiting for Krishna's birth. "You need not fast ma" said her mother-in-law. "You are gonna be a mother very soon. The Lord Krishna in your womb should not starve." For a moment she wondered how on earth could her mom-in-law be so sure that it was Lord Krishna and not Goddess Lakshmi! Was it a guess or a wish? She would not bother much about a confident guess but a hidden wish could bother her a little. Soon the Pooja started after the Priest arrived. She prayed all the time for the arrival of her little one to be smooth without hurdles as she was damn scared of the dreaded delivery. After the pooja she was forced to exercise all the reluctant muscles of her body and bend over with the heavy weight to take the priests blessings. "Suputra Praptirastu" blessed the priest. She asked him why the blessing could not have been "Suputri praptirastu". The priest answered "I thought this would make you happy. If you want me to bless the other way, I would do that". Though "Suputri Praptrastu" would not have increased the "Dakshina" the priest would have got, it definitely made her think all over again as to how widespread the preference for a male child is in India. She had not given a thought when she had to answer questions on Female infanticide in her social studies exams for getting the highest marks in the class. But now she was indeed giving a serious thought.

Why would anyone want a male child instead of a female one? Is it the paternal system to blame where the parents are left with no one to rely on once the girl is married off? Or the multicrore marriage market where the parents have to spend all the earnings of their life on a day of hullabaloo? Or the rituals of Hinduism where the son is considered the sole owner of the right to set the pyre ablaze? Or the responsibility of protecting the white sheet of a girl's reputation from every black mark? Or the calculation of negative ROI on a girl's education and bringing up?

She could come up with counter arguments for every reason that is to be blamed. How many sons have stayed with parents till the end of life without moving out into nuclear families? What is the need to have a fancy wedding when all one needs is a marriage certificate to prove the marriage? Even if one needs to celebrate why cant both parties share the cost? Doesn't the daughter have strong enough hands to hold the funeral torch? Isn't the boy's reputation equally important for a girl to accept him? Cant the girl earn enough to take care of her parents in old age? But all these were just questions. At the end of the day she knew we haven't moved much further in India to answer these questions. Thanks to the randomness in nature. If everyone's wish to have a male child comes true, that would be the last generation in the world!

She remembered her friend at office sharing the happy news that she was expecting. - "Our daughter is three now. So we thought we could try again for a son. We went to Tirupati to offer prayers last week". She wondered - "Doesn't 22 years of education have any effect on the thought process? How long would these people try if the X chromosome triumphed every time? Isn't the risk more than reward for such people? Now I know how my friend at school had 3 sisters and a baby brother. This pattern is very common in Indian families where a set of girls is a followed by a boy." These realizations did not make her very comfortable but she moved on.

The day arrived when she held the little one in her arms and kissed "her". Yes the baby was a "Suputri". She was happy and sent an invite to her friends and relatives to celebrate the arrival of the new member of the family. There came her uncle with a dazzling gift in his hand. He looked at the baby and the baby smiled at him. He said - "DId you not have enough Saffron milk while you were carrying? She is not fair. You will have a tough time marryign her off." Her blood boiled to hear that comment and she retorted - " There is scientific evidence that saffron does not make any difference to baby's colour. If anything is responsible, it could be our genes and the genetic recombination. It could be you or your father or we can go back till Adam and Eve if you have enough time." His face turned red. Not that he was very fair for anyone to notice the redness. He left the place in fury. She did not bother to stop him. But she felt surprised about her new found strength to speak up. Thanks to her baby.

That night she thought lying on the bed - "Why this madness about fairness when nothing is fair about the fairer sex? Why the stress on marriage so early when the baby has just learnt to smile? Would there have been same comments if it was a boy?" She knew the answer. She looked at the little angel sleeping peacefully beside her unaware of the worldly complexities. She smiled with a tear in her eye. For the first time she wished that she had a boy. Not because of any of the reasons she knew about till that day but for the fact she knew that her girl would go through the Indian cycle of comments,comparison and unfairness. She brushed her tears away and decided with a strong resolve that she would protect her girl from all those people who wished she was a boy, from the ones who don't think she is fair or beautiful, from the ones who are reluctant to provide her the love she deserves, from all those who think "Girl is a liability". She would bring her up to be a confident woman who would break all myths.

When would that day come in India where foetal sex determination is no more a crime!

Disclaimer: All the characters in this post are are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Joys of Life

2010-04-15T12:14:00.017+05:30

Memories that make me nostalgic but may not happen again.

Summer vacation in my 3rd class when Anand, Arvind and myself climbed trees to pluck fruits and eat them.
4 people playing choukabara on the floor and the excitement to see what my next throw of die shows up.
Staying out of the house 10 AM to 10 PM playing with the children of the colony.
Having dinner just to have that mango supposed to be had after dinner.
Studying for the last exam every year imagining the days to come after 12 PM the next day.
Small fights with Megha everyday.
Going to movies with mom every Saturday.
Jumping the wall separating the primary and secondary school with Aparna.
Sharing the PJs as the greatest comedy in life with schoolmates.
Combine-study with Savita with intervals of kobri mithai and puliogare.
Waiting for the games period to play In-out dodgeball with classmates.
Anxiety of April 1st every year waiting for the exam results.
Sharing secrets with Arpitha with promises of truth.
Power cut times in the night where the whole street is out with kids on road and parents at the door. I loved dancing in the night on the street :P
Endless games of carrom and lagori played with Ashwini,Ashish,Seema and Alok.
Cool weather of June and the hangover of the summer vacation.
Sharing lunch with classmates at school narrating the stories of endless number of movies I watched.
Sharada madam tuition classes with loads of fun with Sunil and Sanju.
Hoarding 10000 coins in game of Monopoly.
Stealthily eating sweets and chocolates in classes. Sorry to the teachers. :)
The walk to the maths tuition with Arpitha and Shwetha.
Planetarium visits and discovery channel discussions with Melonie.
Night stay watching movies with Shilpa.
Letter writing to friends far off - Nidhi and Ashish.
Eating churmuri at street corner.
Waiting for summer to have JOY ice cream.
Talking diaries of the daily chores to Ashwini.
Van gang to BASE and abundant fun. especially jokes cracked by Venkat intentionally and Meghana unintentionally.
Bunking classes with Deepika and Kavita at college to have chat and chikki at Hanuman stores.
Star-gazing with Archana.
Watching SRK movies at home with a group of 10.
Bulbing at the Titanic movie munching stuff through out.
Mugging the freedom struggle with Gowri.
All the groups of three that I always had.
Mugging for quizzes at IIT library one day before.
Preparing for dance shows and failing on stage.
Forest-trek throughout the campus.
Early morning visits to the beach and the murugan idly.
Night-out mugging for the quiz and night-out chatting after the quiz.
Open air theatre movies.
First year of job - the fights, the chats and the movies.
Stay with Nitika at AECS.
The three musketeers.
Age of SMSing the fiancee at the drop of a hat.
Endless shopping, eating and movies in the engagement period.
The hurry of arrangements of marriage.
Thrill of the honeymoon.

After the honeymoon, you stop. You have grown up. You have responsibilities. The next time you come back to this list is when you have your kid. I had a very happy childhood. I shall add to this list when I re-live the childhood of my kid :)

Thank You Series - Episode 2

2010-03-23T17:21:00.004+05:30

A good measure of maturity is to remind yourself the prejudices and notions of childhood. I had my own set of those.

· Fair people always had a good first impression. I don’t exactly think it logically makes sense now but back then when I was a school kid, I did like to hang around fair people. I admit.

· I also had this notion that “North Indians” are fairer than “South Indians”. And what did North mean to me? Anything North of Karnataka where people can speak Hindi.

· Tenants need to respect the landlords more than vice versa. May be this got imbibed because my parents always made sure they showed some extra respect for the landlords.

Ranju

When I think back now, I don’t hold any of these notions now. But it is nice to remember the lady who shattered all the notions right when I was in the seventh class. That was when I got the opportunity to be the landlord’s daughter for the first time. I was all excited about it. I did rehearse the first few lines I would speak when they would come home the first time. To add to my excitement, my father had told me that they were Hindi speaking north Indians. Now that increased my expectations of “fair” complexion and also the pride of being a KV student who could converse well in Hindi. I remember the day August 1^st, 1996 when the family first landed at out place.

A journey started off from that day – a journey that left such a lasting impression on me that I would never forget that family, especially the lady of the house- Ranju Aunty. First is always special as they say. The first time I met her – my expectations of fair complexion was shattered. I came back home and told my mom. –“She is not North Indian. She is not fair.” Little did I know while cribbing that she would be one woman who would come close to my mom in terms of how much I would love her? As days passed she did win all our hearts. Not only my family but the whole colony used to love her.

What set her apart was her cheerfulness while talking to people of any age-right from a kid to a 70 year old man. The genuine concern that showed up while she enquired – “how are you?” We do ask thousands of people on a daily basis the formal question – “How are you doing?” But how many of those do we really mean? How many times would we call them home and serve dinner if they said they were hungry? But she would. She really meant that trivial question. She was ready to help people any time in any situation which was one of the outstanding qualities that attracted people to her.

I don’t know how many times I have stayed back at her house not missing my parents. To reiterate how much of a big deal that is, there has never been a place other than her house where I have not missed my parents. I still remember the way she used to feed her little son and me the same way saying “Kha goda Kha. Khaye bina mein tumhe jane nahi de rahi”. Probably that was when I put up those few kilos :P She was a great company for anything – Chatting over Chai, watching a movie, cooking. Literally anything. Those 2 years of my life were the most fun-filled ones. There are no words to explain how much of a help she had been to my mom. More than a sister, More than a mother.

Finally when the day for her to leave to go back to “North India” arrived, I could not speak. But my tears did. It has been 12 years since that day now and I still miss you aunty. You were a magic that never fades.

One year of married life

2010-03-03T18:44:00.013+05:30

One year is a long enough period to be important. To list out all the important years of my life

The first year of my life which I don't remember but that does not take away its importance.
The year I experienced school for the first time.
Year spent preparing for the important exams of 10th ,12th and entrances.
First year of job.
First year of marriage.

Of all these, I bet the first year of marriage has been the one that has had a sea-change in my way of life, my outlook, my behavior, my attitude and to put it in two words- My life. So here goes lessons learnt in Marriage 101. That is how courses were named in my Engineering.

You will see new faces of the person you think you know. Take it as a learning rather than -"Oh I did not expect this". Marriage is full of surprises. Expect the Unexpected.
You are watched. Your independence and personal space shrinks. Take it as a blessing that you have someone to share every bit of your space rather than -"Oh God, I am suffocated." The more you share the space, the more you get as it easier to make someone realize your needs when you share and know each other well than laying down conditions and cribbing.
Formalities are bound to be there. You need to smile without reason, you need to enquire about well being even if you are not bothered, you need to act as expected. Take this as -" Free lessons to corporate world" than "Oh why do I need to do all this".
If you thought you were busy, you will only be busier. Clock ticks off with 50% work done. Take this as "Lessons in Time Management" than "Oh God I have time for nothing". Gradually you will get used to the busy schedule and steal your moments out of it.
Friends are seen more in Phonebook and Facebook than face to face. Take this as a test of strong and true friendship than " It is so bad that I dont get to meet my friends so often." True friends will always understand and stay with you. Moreover your spouse is a friend for life.
Your home is not yours anymore. This is probably the hardest facts to digest. You become a guest in the same place where you were born and brought up. Meeting your family becomes moments to steal than demand as a right. Slowly you realise that a half an hour spent with them was never enjoyed so much before. You value your people and the time with them more than anytime before in your life. Take this as "Realising the value of people" than "How dare someone can expect me not to meet my own people whenever I want!"
Your spouse comes before "Yes" to question. Whether it is a party,movie or even an official meeting. Take this as "An invisible hand regularizing your life" than "Oh I could not say yes on my own."

All said and done, Marriage is one of the most beautiful things to happen in ones life. It makes you less selfish and more giving. It makes you care and feel cared. It makes you feel important. It makes you more responsible and planned. It makes you more knowledgeable about human psychology. You are gifted for a life time a shoulder to lean on, hand to hold and trod the path of life, heart to live in and one whole person who is totally yours. Any other relationship in the world has the distinction of "You and me". This is one relationship where the distinction slowly fades into thin air.

God, Thank you for the life you have given me. I wait for more blessings that come with marriage in many more disguised forms.

Timeless in Tokyo

2010-01-14T19:56:00.015+05:30

Tokyo - I had heard about the movie "Love in Tokyo" but never`watched it. I did not know that I would land up in Tokyo before watching the movie. I thought watching the movie was easier and more likely. Yet I am here now. When I joined my job, my superiors had a misconception that I don't like traveling. They claim I told so in the interview. Anyways 2 years passed without me traveling anywhere out of India and now I am here in Tokyo. I have seen people writing travelogues describing the place. But I am not good at that. I would probably pen down what I felt at the place.

Where do I start? I felt so many things that cannot form a coherent paragraph. A set of disconnected lines will do.

Awe of witnessing an organized, well planned city touching the sky when a day before I was stuck for 2 hours in Bangalore Traffic and chaos

Wonder at the way people walk in lines like machines over here.

Pity for the monotony in the lives here.

Surprise to see arrows and boards everywhere telling u where to go and how to walk. There are arrows on staircase and pavement as well.

Embarrassment when I was pointed out by someone that I am standing on the right side on the elevator and I am not supposed to. It leads to jam. I am not supposed to hold a visiting card in one hand. Not supposed to pay the bill by keeping the money on the table rather than the tray meant for it. Apparently people at Osaka stand on the left of the elevator because they are rivals of Tokyo. Now I dont know what to feel for that!

Feel of Freedom when I walk alone singing and dancing to songs on ipod on the street slipping into just anything I catch hold of without bothering about who is commenting on me. I don't know anyone!

Excitement to take a picture of every small damn thing I see and narrate the story to folks back home.

Thrill of shopping gifts for the loved ones from TOKYO and imagine the happiness I would get to see.

Fascination to see the electronics I saw in the showroom back in Bangalore stand as tall buildings all around.

Disbelief to find myself in Starbucks when I am reading the book "How Starbucks Saved my Life" by Michael Gill.

Memories of Bollywood movies when I sip hot coffee and walk on the street at 0 degrees singing a song.

Fear of getting stuck between the doors of the high speed trains. I know there are sensors, but what if they fail!

Amazed to see the love for Japanese in the Japanese when it comes to talking, boards, bills, books. In short everything and anything. Come on, at least the currency coin should have a number on it! Either they hate English or love Japanese too much.

Joy to see an Indian Veg Restaurant to feed this hungry Veggie in Tokyo.

Fulfillment when the client acknowledged the meeting was useful in his Japanese style by bowing.

Feeling the smallness and the greatness of mankind simultaneously when I stood next to the Tokyo Tower.

Gratitude for the politeness of the Japanese I interacted with for making my stay comfortable.

Pride of visiting a wax museum though I am not talking about the Madame Tussauds in London.

Child-like satisfaction after watching a Japanese 3-D animation and the dolphins dance live.

That

makes it 19 different feelings. If 20 is a good round number, the one I had saved for last is

Urge to go back to India.

How much ever I see the world, whatever I enjoy, whatever good my mind finds in the other places, at the end of the day I would always like to be back home. Either I have got used to the imperfections in India or it has become such an inherent part of my life that perfection makes me feel out of place :)

"Apne sadak ke kone me apnon ke saath pani puri khane me jo mazaa rakha hai us ke liye aise kitne bhi posts kaafi nahi."

Love
Goda

PS: If you are still wondering why the title is Timeless in Tokyo, I left my watch back in India. My cell was drained out of battery and did not work here. So I had no idea of time yet managed my days. But as a tip, leaving ur mobile and watch in the trash for a day allows u to feel the life without pressure.

Moments to Steal

2009-12-22T15:57:00.002+05:30

First sip of coffee in the morning with Newspaper
Chirping of birds in morning silence with the coolness of dewdrops
First bite of food when you are infinitely hungry
Entering the last number in a Sudoku
Eating an icecream when there is noone around to remind you about diet
Sudden plan for a movie
Noticing purple flowers in the office campus one fine day when u look up and away from the security and vehicles
The long night before a holiday
Finding time for a stroll in a busy day
Waking up after a wonderful dream
Playing your favorite song on ipod
Unexpected call or mail from a friend
Manager on Leave

Who is the kid?

2009-11-18T20:02:00.013+05:30

"Ladies and Gentlemen. For security reasons passengers are requested to bring to the notification of the airport security any unclaimed baggage" announced the akashvani at the Bengaluru International Airport. A lady with streaks of grey hair hiding the wrinkles on her forehead and heavy woolen sweater protecting her from the chill of 4 30 AM in Bengaluru sat on the bench with a basket. A basket full of stuff typical of South Indian outing - A coffee flask, a small tiffin box with upma in it, a napkin and a water bottle. She was neither aware of the eat-outs at the airport nor could figure out what the announcement meant. She asked her husband in Kannada innocently.

"What are they saying ? Are they saying our daughter's flight has come?"

"No. They are saying that now a days it is very insecure out here as terrorists attack any place. So we should be careful."

"Oh My God. I should have lighted the lamp at home and done the Pooja at home before leaving. You said we dont have time even to take bath and come."

"Of course. You were bent upon preparing the breakfast and then leaving. Now lets just wait. I am already tensed till I see my daughter. Don't talk all this now."

She remained silent as she could understand his restlessness. The clock ticked by and an hour passed. It was the time for the arrival of BA 119 in which their daughter was coming. It was delayed by 20 min. The anxious father kept moving to the display board and back to the bench again and again. His feeble eye-sight would not allow him to check the status sitting on the bench. She could not wait longer and she started her questions again.

"What did you see?"

"The flight is going to come soon."

"Can we see the flight when it comes?"

"No, it will come on the other side of this building. We wont be able to see it. But they will write it on the board when it comes."

"Oh. What about all the luggage. She has to bring it from the other side of the building till here. How do they get down from the plane? Kids are also coming. How will she manage?"

"Even I am worried. But they will give her luggage only later is what she told. Then she can get it on those trolleys we saw others going with sometime back. They put some ladder for her to get down."

"Good they have some facility like that. But what if they don't give her the right luggage?"

"I think they will give. She asked us not to worry"

As soon as the display showed - "ARRIVED", he called his wife - "Come soon. The flight has come." She juggled the basket, umbrella and the small purse that had the cash to start running towards the arrival gate. A young girl of 25 sitting next to her waiting for the same flight interrupted and said -"It will take time for them to come out. Immigration and customs formalities will be there." The terms did not make an iota of sense to the lady. Probably she heard those terms for the first time. She gave a smile acknowledging that she heard the girl but continued her sprint.

Among the crowd holding placards at the arrival gate were these old couple with their eager sight hooked on to the farthest point they could see through the glass doors. There was no sight of any passenger till 20 min. But neither the eagerness nor the strength to stand there decreased. Finally after 40 min, the lady exclaimed - "I can see the kids. Bend down here. You can also see their legs." The old man tried to bend down to get a glimpse. It did not occur to him that it is a matter fo 5 mins that they will be standing right in front of him. It was the joyous moment they had been waiting for. Every second from then was like an year. The last few seconds had them slowly sneaking into the area reserved for passengers to hug the kids and their daughter.

There were smiles and there were tears. For anyone who would have observed them for those 2 hours, it was tough to say that the separation was only 3 months and that their daughter is a 30 year old software Engineer who has roamed the world. For parents, it does not matter, does it? For they don't see a difference between the two kids who ran to them at the gate and their daughter who walked slowly towards them. She always remains a kid to them even if they have to figure out the technological world like a kid trying to learn new things.

Din

2009-10-10T23:00:00.005+05:30

I know his name. Not sure if he knows mine.

I don't understand what he speaks except for"xyz Ringitts" and he does not understand anything I speak except for the destination and time.

It is easy to guess now that he is a taxi driver in Kuala Lumpur.

Strange are the ways how humans develop relationships. It does not need a language. All it needs is the connection.

I went for a week there, stayed at a hotel and happened to take his taxi on the very first day. Uncertain about the situations and conditions in a foreign city when you are alone, I asked him a for a daily pick up and drop. He agreed. i had tough time explaining "daily" and had to say something like - Tomorrow, tomorrow tomorrow and tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow. Funny isn't it? He came daily and had the same smile. We used to just nod to each other instead of a "good morning" or "good evening". I used to use signs to ask questions like - what are the places to see around? How to reach there? " After a point I realized it is the signs I am using more important and not the language I used for myself. So I used to speak in Kannada and show the right signs using hands and face. It worked.

He showed me how to reach Petronas towers. He took me to Putra Lake. Even in a country of nobody for me, I felt i had somebody when I went with him. Strange trust and confidence that surprised me.

On the last day, when I was leaving I felt - "I might not meet him again in life. No mode of contact. Of course there are no signs on telephone. But he has escorted me everywhere. Unknowingly guarded my safety. When I think of all the possibilities and how bad the world can be, I feel a sense of gratitude for him." When I had a tough time asking for places, how would I even talk about such a complex vague feeling. Of course I cannot.

When I got down at the airport, I was short of cash by 10 Ringitts. I said - "Only 180". He just nodded which said -"Its ok". He left after exchange of smiles. I don't know if he figured our I felt grateful. But it is a good feeling to be thankful.

Random Thought # 8

2009-09-18T21:47:00.003+05:30

Thought: A friend is someone who can be source of your happiness and sink to your sorrows.

Reason: Blessed with such friends

Explanation: You don't need heat and mass transfer course for this :D

Thank you series - Episode 1

2009-09-05T22:06:00.008+05:30

For all those who are reminded of Ekta kapoor as soon as you hear "episode" this will not be a never-ending dramatic soap. If you have read "The touch of gratitude" I had mentioned that I keep a list of all those people who have gone out of their way to help me at any point in my life. So I got this new idea of starting a series of articles where I get an opportunity to let the world know that such kind-hearted people live on this earth and also thank them wholeheartedly. So here goes the first one. Since today is Teacher's day, I can as well start off with my teacher.

Kamal Peter

The whole school would agree with me that there is no student who studied in Kendriya Vidyalaya Malleswaram and does not know her irrespective of whether she taught you in a classroom or not. She is not just a popular person but someone whom you can never ignore. If you happen to be at the same latitude and longitude as her, you would not move without noticing her. If you happen to meet and talk to her, you would never forget her. For any person who knows her, the name itself would ring a bell and bring to memories a beautiful,charming and inspiring lady who commands respect from old and young. I wonder how many people would have gone home and looked at the dictionary whenever they heard her speeches in splendid English. But wait, she was a Science teacher. It does not really matter what you teach if you are an all-rounder like her. All said and done about her success story, she is a really nice person to interact with. She understands you, she encourages you, she leads you and she will make you feel important. She is the only one who calls me "Beta" and she means it. A small incident which brought her into my book would leverage that statement.

It is common for teachers to turn into nutritionists during lunch breaks and walk around in the classrooms to find out what and how the children are eating. It is enough work for the moms to ensure all the different nutrients mentioned in the science book are packed in the lunch box. But my mom was unwell to even enter the kitchen at that point of time. My father did a good job of juggling the responsibilities of a bank officer and a father. Unfortunately one day he too fell sick which made me knock the doors of "Iyer mess" as they called it those days to pack the breakfast idli as lunch for myself. She was a sharp teacher who could look through the curries in various lunch boxes to figure out the proportion of various nutrients. A paper packed lunch would not miss her eye. She took to me to the junior lab (It was something that she started. Otherwise lab would be something we would have experienced only after tenth class). She asked me with concern - "Goda, May I ask you why you have packed lunch from a hotel?" As soon as she learnt the reason, she immediately said - "Tomorrow onwards, I am going to bring lunch for you till your parents are fine"

Packing an extra box of lunch while you do it for yourself and your kids might not be a big deal. The big deal is to have the concern to find out and to offer such a help. It was a big deal for me. Ask someone in the desert how big a deal a drop of water is. This is just one of the most memorable of the innumerable ways in which she has shaped my life. I would like to thank her from the bottom of my heart.

Madam, you are awesome and I love you.

Random Thought # 7

2009-08-26T13:39:00.002+05:30

How many parts are simultaneously functioning in our body? I don't want the exact answer except that it is a huge number.
In spite of the innumerate ways in which things can go wrong given the permutations and combinations, I feel damn lucky that it is functioning properly :)

Love-Hate relationship

2009-08-21T11:22:00.004+05:30

I love :

My Family
Friends and the time with them.
Humour
Coffee with Newspaper
SRK
OR
Listening to music in nature
Dancing to Bollywood songs
Playing keyboard
Figuring out constellations standing on the terrace
Spongebob Squarepants
Books that make me feel "Oh I know something now"
Baloons
Bright evenings
Compassion

I Hate:

Artificiality
Sarcasm
Hypocrisy
heavy rains and Marshy roads
Darkness
Money-mindedness
Loneliness
Insensitivity

P and L

2009-08-16T21:01:00.005+05:30

A B C D... This is what we started off with as nursery kids. But as we grow up we are left with just 2 letters out of the 26 - P and L. If you still did not get what it is, it means you still have the kid inside you. Grow up! Of course it is Profit and Loss. The two terms we hear the most in our daily lives in different forms. More so if you are in a corporate environment.

"What do I gain?" or to introduce more philanthropy and unity "What do we gain?". "What is the incentive to do xyz?" The most common questions I heard all day long had made me conclude it is all about gain and loss. More the progress humans are making, farther are we moving from "emotions, humanity, selflessness, care" and all such great words which are only part of books and movies which are again made to make some P :P

I often think about it and move on with my life lest I am left behind. Yesterday I was going on a bike ( Of course Pillion... I have still not become confident enough to ride one myself. I confess.)
I was lost in my own world framing my philosophy when I heard an unknown voice from behind -"Madam" It is rare to to find known people approach you and say a "hi" without a purpose. We have got too busy to do something without this other P. For a moment I wondered what would this stranger have to talk to me in the middle of the road! He continued - "Your dupatta". "My dupatta what??" "Oh it was close to the wheels and could have been dangerous if only he had not warned me". He moved ahead swiftly before I could realize and say a "Thank you". But that left me thinking - "Oh world has still not become that bad after all. There are people still who feel like doing something however small it is when it comes to some strangers life without thinking - How do I care!" It made me smile :)

May be my small world did not create enough such examples for me every day to remind me world is still beautiful. Its not that bad after all. Or
May be I was not looking at the right places and kept pushing myself towards cynicism. Or
May be world is indeed the way I think where such examples are rare to find.

I don't have the perfect answer. Yet I would like to believe I have not been looking at the right places. The article in the newspaper the next day about a guy who distributes slippers anywhere he finds someone walking barefoot was indeed inspiring and reassuring. He has been doing that for 5 years without publicity (the other P). It assured me two things - "Its not that bad after all."
" Well, I have started looking in the right direction."

Random Thought #6

2008-11-30T21:52:00.003+05:30

Thought: There are no no happy endings in life like movies.There are only happy times or happy periods. (NO! I did not mean what some ads say :D)

Reason: Was thinking philosophically. I swear and not about the ads for girls :D

Explanation: Life goes on with happiness and sadness alternating and the end is death after which there is neither of them.

Random Thought #5

2008-10-19T01:07:00.001+05:30

Thought: As babies you wet bed and as adults you wet pillows.

Explanation: Self explanatory if you have experienced !

Friend, U have a problem...

2008-10-13T16:29:00.001+05:30

Friend, U have a problem when…..

U touch ur dream, be on cloud nine, thank the heavens and then,

U have to trace back ur path to the point where you dreamt from….

U pray all day long for the happiness of one person and then,

U have no way to know if your prayers are answered…..

U are complimented that u have a beautiful smile and then,

U know ur heart is not smiling…..

U are welcomed with the news of a salary hike and then,

U know u cant spend on what u want…

U are blessed with most wonderful people around u and then,

U know they cannot be with u….

U travel the world flying everywhere and then,

U are desperate to spend that one day at home…

U pray God to forgive u for ur sins and then,

U know u cant forgive urself….

U are young and have years of hope in front of u and then,

U feel ur thoughts are locked in the past….

U are appreciated for truthfulness and honesty and then.

U r expected to be unreal…..

U promise the world to your loved ones and then,

All u have is a place in ur heart for them….

Friend, you have a problem when….

U think of composing a poem and then,

U have all penned down sad thoughts glaring at u….

Random Thought #4

2008-08-28T19:44:00.003+05:30

Thought: People can give you piece of mind but peace of mind should come from within.

Reason: Of course I am experienced :D and have collected many such pieces, played jigsaw puzzle and kept them aside now.

Explanation: People may comment on your actions, decisions and your ways but what you do with it , how you make the decision, how you live with it and whether you achieve peace of mind is left to you.

Random thought #3

2008-06-06T14:45:00.002+05:30

Thought : Mythology is about interchangeability of species and biological experiments.

Reason: A cafeteria random discussion in office.

Explanation : Random interconversion of humans and the rest of the species.

Poll result

2008-05-24T15:27:00.003+05:30

88% of the females prefer standing and taking bath.* So I have proved my mom wrong and myself right. \:D/ Well, did I reveal something I had promised to after knowing the results?

My blog title has lived up to its name. 9 people voted for this poll which my school teacher would have declared as utter nonsense and joblessness.

I thank all the people who voted from the bottom of my stomach. [ I thought I could go deeper:D] I shall keep the jobless polls coming and you keep voting. Lets wait for my mom's next claim.

* I am making a basic assumption that all the people who voted are females. Sorry if there were some males who know their girl friends too well :D. Nothing to be ashamed of. Its good. Thumbs up! I like that spirit.

Business partnering

2008-05-24T13:05:00.019+05:30

Now don't tell me of all the websites freely available you found this one to get some business knowledge. (Well, may be at the end of this post you will become an entrepreneur, but thats a different issue )

Introduction:

Shaadi.com - Does that ring a bell on what I am writing about. It would have, considering the fact that it is a very difficult task to find greater "Bulb" than me.

"COM" it is. All of us turn into entrepreneurs when we start dealing with this whole business of matrimony. Do you agree with me? Let us try looking at the business process.

Business Decision:

Is this the appropriate time to start the business ?

Output :

---------> NO ---------> Shut up and study! :D

---------> YES -------->Lets become entrepreneurs :(.

Business process:

Stage 1

Data collection

Name ( Who cares! May be numerologists will)
DOB ( Decides if it is an uncle or a friend)
Family members ( Of course you need to talk business with them!)
Job and Salary ( Deciding factor for future investments)
Gotram, Nakshatram and Kundali ( I think all businesses start on a "supposed to be" auspicious day under "supposed to be" auspicious conditions)
Phone numbers and mail ids ( for initiation of business negotiations)

This can be outsourced to agencies that work only during humanly hours.

Stage 2

Filtering of data

Min Max bound on DOB for long term business partnering [ Uncles may reach heavenly abode soon! :( ]
Maximization of expected revenues based on job and salary ( I bet the shopping rate of girls needs that!)
Max bound on number of family members ( Similar to our nations objective - Lower the population, the better! :D Mera Bharath Mahan)
Maximization of points in Kundali matching. [When unknown is an ocean you tend to believe corporation water :)].

Stage 3

Contact initiation

The conversation goes something like this.

*BOC*.

Mami/Mama (Ladies first!) no 1 : Is it Mr ***** ? [that was not a bad word. I just bulbed recalling some name. :D It could be a bad word in the later stages. Not during contact initiation].

Mami/Mama no 2 : Yes....

Mami/Mama no 1: I got your contact from something.com/ something services/ some arbit person and I would like to talk regarding an alliance that I propose.

Mami/Mama no 2 : Why don't you email the horoscope and photos? We can talk after that.

*EOC*.

Stage 4

Data transfer through electronic means

Hello,

Attached are the photo, horoscope and biodata of my daughter Goda.D.R (for example).

Regards,

Mami/Mama

Stage 5

Data Analysis by the partnering company

Thats a black box to me. So don't ask!

Stage 6

Response

Let me show you some examples here.

Example 1

Mami/Mama,

We have received the horoscope and the photo. We'll take it up further and get back to you.

Regds,

Mami/Mama

Cycle time ----> infinity

Example 2

Dear Mami/Mama

Very Sorry. We are looking for a girl more than 5.5" height as my son's height is 6.1".

All the best for your daughter.

Thanks and Regards,

**** ( NO disclaimers here)

WT*

OK, We shall analyze this in a later post.

Example 3

Dear Mami/Mama

We are happy to inform you that the horoscopes have matched and we would like to meet your family soon.

Awaiting your response

Mami/Mama

Stage 7

Meeting Conference

Agenda of the conference

The delicious Upma/Coffee combo table service. [Caution: Buffets are considered more of an insult than informality].
Formal inquiries
Wide smiles. [Reminds me of Chandler's work laugh]
Presentation of previous annual results and future forecasts of performance.
Expectation review
Arrival at consensus on date of future communication

Stage 8

Future communication

Will tell you how it is when that happens. :D

Stage 9

Sign of contract

Some people call it engagement. You take pics and also flaunt your deal by inviting people who are more bothered about grub than you. So better serve good grub for good publicity.

Stage 10

Start of business and End of business too :)

Exponential variations!

2008-05-17T16:47:00.006+05:30

Bad picture quality.... But makes sense!

Side effects of bulbing!

2008-05-16T16:37:00.004+05:30

If you are a normal human being then what does bulb mean to you?

"Source of artificial light that works by incandescence"

If you are a biologist?

"Underground vertical shoot that has modified leaves used as food storage organs"

Enough of knowledge transfer from wiki to blogspot. Coming to the point- what would a bulb mean to you if you are from IIT Madras?

"Hmmm.. Ahem... Grr.... Well, it has become so much a part of my language that I cant find the definition in English :D. Let me try. It would be a person like me who cannot grasp obvious things fast which results in late realizations"

Note: That does not tell anything about my grasping power, intelligence or speed. It can be thought of as a side effect of high grasping power, intelligence bla bla bla which leads to such a symptom when all these great attributes take a nap. :) [ Ah ! I love that explanation]

So now I am going to give you an example of side effect of a side effect :D

I got a new Sony Ericson 810i mobile with my bonus. Don't be under the assumption that my bonus= price of the mobile.
Reasons:

Bonus amount is supposed to be confidential. Even if you are assuming something please please please forget it! I am not supposed to reveal something here.
Mobile prices are very dynamic now a days. That gives me some relief. :) Now I can keep the month of bonus to myself :D in case you are very interested and find out the price of the mobile in that month. OK I hear that. You said something like "What nonsense!". Cool then I happily move on.

I spend some days with earphones adorning my ears all the time. Then I shift to the other functionality. Yes, the camera. I become self obsessed and click away pics to glory. And then comes the time to flaunt all those pics.

Status :" Process completed successfully"

[Before I go to the feedback section, some background required. I am obsessed with one more thing in life. The beautiful emoticons that various IM services provide. I love them and I call all of them smileys irrespective of what they emote. Someone sometime back told me that using emoticons in official conversations is considered as "unprofessional". ]

Feedback: This is where you will have the fun of side effects.

Mr XYZ ( On a professional conversation) : So when do we get to discuss the next steps?

Miss Goda ( In not so professional mood) : Let us think together and discuss the same on monday face to face :)

Mr XYZ : Ok That sounds good.

Mr XYZ again ( On shifting to a not so professional conversation which I bulbed to notice!) : Your display pic looks good. BTW > you need not put smileys.

Miss Goda ( Bulbing) : Oh I am sorry. You dont like smileys? ( Cursing herself for performing an unprofessional act!)

Mr XYZ ( Giving up on her heights of bulbing and the forcing situation to explain ): I meant your display pic itself is like a smiley.

Miss Goda ( Realizing that she bulbed) : Oh Thanks. [ Subconsciously :-|]

Ok Ok. Had a loud hearty laugh? Fine. It happens. Especially when you are not used to getting frequent compliments. :D

The side effect of it all is you feel "Oh shit!" even after getting a compliment.

Titleless- for suspense

2008-05-15T15:02:00.007+05:30

Warning : Don't read this post if you are not in a mood for some dose of sentiment. I wont feel bad :). Quite Possible if you are in India and you watch movies.

Why am I writing it? Because my father asked me to. You may give me a Colon O [:O] look after reading it. So don't stuff anything now lest it falls out of your mouth.

You forget to think what you are getting or what you are spending when you find out what makes that person happy.
Your blood boils when you hear anybody speak ill of that person or hurt that person.
You are filled with tears when you think of a day when that person is not going to be with you and you dread that day.
Any kind of fight, you end up feeling you are at fault and you try to make up and probably tell "Sorry".
You get concerned when that person's health is screwed up and you put efforts to make him/her the healthiest person on earth ( may be in vain, but you do).
You feel prouder than for your own achievement when he/she is appreciated.
This or this if remotely related to the person can make you miss him/her in absence.Well, if you are wondering what I am trying to say, you could take it as "top to bottom". ( Disclaimer* - I am not endorsing anything)
You don't feel like cribbing about the person even in the warashht situations to anyone. So any opposition you have just stays internal and you suffer.

:O . Hmm I expected it. Basically my father wanted to know what is all this fuss about love! And of course, it is not only for a romantic relationship. He wanted me to write on general Love I perceive. I guess the points hold good for anyone - your dad mom hubby wiffy ( new term coined for wife).

Going by the popular perception that senti stuff are boring to read, if you did not like this and still ended up reaching this point, well it does not matter. You can come back for my next post and check out because I am not a consistent person. Who knows! next post may be better.

See ya... I am calling my father to have a look now.

Koi Nahi Mila

2008-05-14T14:19:00.000+05:30

Random Thought #2

2008-05-14T00:01:00.003+05:30

Thought : You should marry when you get pimples to marry off children when you get wrinkles.

Explanation: Not required

Reason : Tried to give a thought to mother's advice. :D

Proofless!

2008-05-13T13:09:00.008+05:30

As we grow up we have to face the Government offices again and again to escape identity crisis. It all goes in a circle. You need an address proof to get a passport and instructions read - You can submit your DL, Ration card, Voter's ID . To get a DL you need an address proof again which says- You can submit Passport,Ration card and Voter's ID and I am sure you don't want me to repeat it for the Voter's ID.( Why such a craze for address proof in a country where many are homeless ?)

*Sigh* My family does not have a ration card and I am caught in this vicious circle not knowing where to start!

I started off with a Bank Passbook ( Thanks to my father who told it can be used) and can you believe it? I still do the rotations and revolutions in various Government offices like planet earth with the same passbook :(.

I have this famous track record of never getting the work done the first time at any Govt office. I am sure it is not a great record because there will be thousands like me ( Forgot the greater numbers taught at school:D).

Passport- the file goes missing and delivery of the passport is delayed by 2 months!I get it for my hostel address where I live only for an year and after that again I am address proofless!
Driving License-I fail the LL test when I go personally :( but pass the DL test directly second time when I go through a driving agency. Again for a temporary address I don't live in now :(.
Voter's ID- Power cut when my photo has to be taken and on another day I get a Voter's ID with the wrong address ( I am destined not to have an address proof) which needs to be corrected in the second round where my photo will be taken again. Aah I feel like a model :D.
PAN card- For some strange reason they don't print address on the card :(.

God gave me a beautiful home, but I need to keep proving to everyone :(. I would like to thank Ammembal Subbarao Pai. Wondering who that is? He is the founder of Canara Bank in which I have the account that has been with me through all these ups and downs.

Random thought #1

2008-05-11T22:24:00.004+05:30

Thought : Pleasure of sex is greater than pain of delivery in magnitude.

Explanation: People go for more than one child. May be it is because pleasure is for two and pain for one :-?

Reason : Watched a program on National Geography today.

Mother's day

2008-05-11T18:08:00.004+05:30

Second Sunday of May is the day to honor all the mother's in the world. Thats today! Wow. I did not remember it till I got my brush in the hand to clean up my teeth today. I got out of slumber suddenly and the bulb lit up.

I immediately rushed through rest of the process and went up to my mother and tried to be cute saying -"Happy Mother's day, Mummy" and then I could see tears of happiness in her eyes and it got all mushy. She hugged me tight and kissed me [:-*]. Damn! My teacher told me in school I should stop day dreaming. Well, all those things in Italics was my day dream. She said - " Stop calling me Mummy. It means dead-body!" [:O]

Ok now I said "Happy Mother's day Amma" in our own sweet native language and asked her
-" So what do you want for Mother's day? Shall I buy you a new mobile?" OK, may be my dream would come true now[:)] She said
-" Why cant you show all this love daily? Should someone somewhere in the world declare publicly when you should love your mom?"

That makes sense. I have learnt a lesson today.

There is no special day to say "I love you" and express it. Do it everyday like you brush your teeth. And the result would be great - A heartfelt Colgate smile [:D]

(Wait a sec! Was that Pepsodent? I never observe it you know. I am always sleepy when I brush and I don't buy stuff for home. Me the Lazy bum!)

Thanksgiving

2008-05-09T17:29:00.014+05:30

OK I hear that and I agree that it is not October in Canada or November in US . Come on! We are in India! [You can see the "d" because of my favorite pink background :)]. That does not mean I can celebrate it in May. Moreover I am a pure vegetarian and hence

" No Turkey Business"

Then next question - " Why this post?" and the answer is " Generally" :D

Now that we are set for Thanksgiving let me start by making it clear that here " I am the post creator and hence I will be giving away all the thanks to God". You can do it after reading the whole thing. ( if u feel like)

I shall start with the highest intensity of Thanksgiving and go down the lane so that when u finish reading you'll feel light again like you are doing now.

Scene 1: Physiotherapy centre

I shall start of saying "Thanks" to you for raising those eyebrows wondering if something is wrong with me. Chill! I am fine. I had been there with mom for her treatment. I also got to meet this 25 year old fair and beautiful ( they don't go together always) girl waiting for treatment. My first blame was towards the long sitting hours in AC offices which could screw up your backbone. But I soon realized that was not the reason why she was here. She was a victim of "Muscular dystrophy" . Yes I too remembered Vidya Balan from Guru. But here there was no Madhavan to love her and take care. Her parents though very rich never found peace of mind because of this. She cant sit straight and her spinal cord is totally useless now. She always needs help for the basic things we do with ease like urinating. Being a girl I tried to imagine what she would do during those days which are advertised as " way to freedom" by Shhhh ( Whisper - if you did not catch the euphemism).

I don't dare to describe her problems any further. It is very depressing.

I thank GOD for giving me an intact spinal cord !!

Scene 2: A road on the way to office

I am running late to office. You may ask me how is it possible in the era of Fle?i timings ( that ? is x which became too fle?ible). Well, it all depends on how your teammates are -early birds or late lathiefs.
On the way I see a house ( I am not sure if I can call it a house because all it had were three walls - two of bricks and one of mud and a roof of dried up coconut leaves). Immediately my mind thinks of the time when Bangalore was flooded due to imbalances in nature created by man. It should have been terrible! What are they doing? Brushing teeth with some coal and bathing in dirty water? Are they cleaning themselves up or making themselves dirty! Should I mention how they would eat?
God! How could I crib about the hefty salary I am paid?

I thank GOD for making me capable of meeting the basic necessities of food, house and hygiene :)

Scene 3 : Diagnostic center

Ok Ok. Again nothing wrong with me. Its my mom again. She had to go through a blood test. Now it is not about any of the patients there. Let us think "Out of the Dabba" ( I hear it too often now a days). It is about the people who conduct those tests in the lab. I talk to a person to find out his " job profile". He comes at 7 am in the morning traveling 10 km to this center and he is welcomed by whole lot of SHIT. Yes, I mean it in the literal sense. He has to examine hundreds of different stool samples and he does it the whole day. So he gets to have his lunch break, evening tea everything in between. I think how could anyone aspire for or choose such a career and within seconds my "SANE" head bangs me on my head ( outer surface) and says " Stupid! Do you think he would if he had the freedom to do anything better?" Roti, makan, kapada ke liye kuch bhi karna padtha hai. Ab to aadat pad gayi hogi.

I thank God for giving me a job that I enjoy ( I may not express it always !) and can do sitting at home or in an AC room.

I don't have a favorite number. So I don't stick to the same number of points. You need not expect 5 because of my previous blog or 4 because of the previous previous .. n times blog! There is always suspense [:D]. I decide to stop with three scenes :)

Now that I am done, you can start your Thanksgiving.

"Happy Thanksgiving "

Only Love is Real

2008-05-07T12:19:00.005+05:30

Wondering how I got romantic after Chicken Pox? No, it is not a side effect of the antivirals I took. But I can say it is a consequence of Chicken Pox because how else on earth could I get so much time to read this book titled "Only Love is Real"? I swear even I had not heard of it before. :) It was not all that great that I talk about it in a post. But there were some lines which can switch on some romantic switches in you. So without wasting time I am going to copy those lines here.

1. Destiny dictates meeting of soulmates. We will meet them. But what we decide to do after meeting falls in the province of choice or freewill.A wrong choice or a missed chance can lead to incredible loneliness and suffering. A right choice, an opportunity realized can bring us profound bliss and happiness.

Not so romantic is n't it? May be I can call it a foundation stone :)

2. Soul recognition may be immediate. A sudden feeling of familiarity of knowing this person at depths far beyond what the conscious mind could know. At depths usually reserved for intimate family members. Intuitively knowing what to say, how they will react. A feeling of safety and a trust far greater than could be earned in one day or one week or one month.

I don't seem to be moving ahead from foundation :(

3. Passion in a relationship cannot be artificially created. There can be respect, and there can be compassion, but the chemistry has to be there from the start.

Hmm.. Started talking about Chemistry haan :)

4. It is delusional to believe that this passion, this soul recognition and attraction will be easily found again with one more person. You do not run into such a soulmate everyday, perhaps only once in a lifetime. Listen to your heart, to your own intuitive wisdom when making important decisions, especially when deciding about a gift of destiny, such as a soulmate. If you rely exclusively on the advice of others you may make terrible mistakes. Your heart knows what you need.Your heart will find it inconceivable that you will not be together.

Hmm.. some dose of Hindi movie dialogues :)

5. When your intuitions, your gut feelings, your spiritual heart all know beyond any doubt, do not be swayed by fear based arguments of others. Sometimes meaning well and sometimes not, they might lead you far astray from your joy.

May be.....

At the end of it, it was not all that romantic :(
I don't know why I felt so while reading the book.

Chicken Pox for the Soul

2008-05-06T18:18:00.013+05:30

Ladies and Gentlemen! I am back like a Phoenix after staying away from BLOGSPOT for some time now. There is a small difference though. :) Phoenix comes back from ashes but I am back from the crusts of Chicken Pox however gross that may sound. It is said " Truth is always bitter " but it can be gross too sometimes you see. Since I am back I would like to start the resurrected [Seems like GRE prep is helping :)] blog with a bulleted list of things that Chicken pox taught me in life. Sounds interesting? If not you can stop reading here and move on to an alternate tab in your firefox browser. [ If you are not one of those outdated IE fans :) *]

1. Things take their own time baby! Patience!

"Ah this is chicken pox". The Doctor said with an air of confidence as soon as he saw the blisters on my hand. " No need to worry. Rest of the blisters will come up in another 5 days and then crust and fall. You don't have to do anything except taking some antivirals. You better don't do anything. If you try to scratch, break the water bubble or pull the crust, it might leave a scar!" Does not that sound terrifying for an Indian girl yet to be married ? :"> [ If you did not get what that is, it is an emoticon showing me blush ]
So there started my week of idleness and vettiness personified making me arrive at this macro theory about life. You will have to wait for the dark clouds of problems you feel helpless about to move away. No use trying to meddle with them and turning them into a permanent worry. Just be calm and wait for them to pass on. As someone said - " This too will pass". All problems are like blisters of chicken pox which appear and then go away. You just have to wait with patience. I bet you did not like the comparison. But you know you cant help it if you are still reading it. This too shall pass :D because we move to the next point.

2. Keep it short!

That was not for my blog. No way! I am not keeping this post short. May be next time! The point I am trying to make here is it is very common for people to shoot a formal question to you when they call you or meet you. " How are you ? " if they do not know you are unwell and " How are you feeling now? " if they already know it. Poor souls. What else can you expect them to ask? But do you really think they are interested in your details of experience of illness ( Chicken pox in this case) ? I bet for a big "NO". So keep it short and learn to say " I am feeling better". That would make both of you comfortable. You would not want someone to hang up or get out and think -" Why the hell did I ask?", would you?
* This rule applies to all kinds of illness that affect human species

3. Your Share is yours!

Wondering what this means? If you are, my intention of writing the title in a cryptic way ( if you can call it so ) is successful :). If not, OK lets move on.
How many ever people you have surrounding you, helping you out, running up and down to get things done for you, Baby! it is real/cruel world. You must go through your share of pain. You cant give it away and there is no alternative. I am not preaching about KARMA here. Hmm May be something like that. Stating this principle at a macro level would look something like this - " YOU CANT ESCAPE WHAT YOU ARE BOUND TO GO THROUGH. THERE IS NO LUCKY BUSINESS".

4. Stop cribbing !

Yes, I am saying this. you can pinch yourself painlessly twice :). OK since you are done, I can rephrase it. It is very painful to be idle all day. So better enjoy the busy schedule you have and appreciate it. Next time I meet you neither of us will say - " I am sick of my hectic schedule". Done? Can you believe I got jealous of people slogging out at my office? I did :) Of all those people running up and down buying grocery, paying bills, cleaning house and on the lighter side playing badminton. It is not fun at all to lie down for hours. You may wish for it when you get up after a 5 hour sleep but I bet your wish will exponentially decrease and be zero beyond 15 hours may be.
Not to forget the cribbing I did last time at the office restaurant. After having plain curd rice for 7 days I feel like kissing the hands of the guy who sells the combo meal at office. [Caution: Dont take it in the literal sense! ]

5. Identify your friends ! Soon.

Testing times they call it. I think it is called so because such times are the ones which conduct a free " No fee " test for all your friends and hand out the results. You can get a filtered list of friends who care for you and for whom you matter. You need not wait till Chicken pox for this. Any kutti testing time is also fine :). Identify those gems and treasure them without ever forgetting that they have passed the test.

I think five should be enough. I am grateful to you for reading till here. So for all the beautiful people who got the patience to endure till the fifth point from the first point, here is an offer. You can read one more personal realization :)

6. I love coffee! I missed you :)

Thats all from me now. See you. Buh Bye!

*Disclaimer : Opinions expressed in this blog are purely personal and are not chargeable under law according to the fundamental right of freedom of expression

Resolution to Realization!

2008-03-30T00:51:00.004+05:30

Late to Bed, Early to Rise, Long travel and hours of staring at the flat screen monitors is what describes the lifestyle of the IT employees. So what do I do to stay away from high cholesterol and diabetes in my old age? I don’t have enough time to exercise or to go to a gym." Use stairs and avoid lift" is what my friend told me. I made this my New Year resolution. After all it is only 2 floors I thought. As usual when I went to the staircase with bubbling enthusiasm this morning, I saw a queue. "Did all the people in the building make the resolution?" I thought. I got reminded of hospitals which make patients wait endlessly as a strategy to increase the revenue by worsening their health during the wait. Government offices which make people go through 10 different queues to hand over a card that is not even 10 inches long. Long Queues in front of temples – Thayaar on Tuesday and Friday, Shani Mahatma and Hanuman on Saturday, Raghavendra on Thursday. Why don’t people go and see these temples on other days? God is available all the days but people wish to see only on the so called ASSIGNED days! Then the whole purpose is gone. You are more worried about who is barging into your queue than God you want to see or the prayers you wish to offer! After a brief travel in my thought world I increased my height by standing on my toes get a peek into the problem of the day. I could see thousands of A4 sheets forming a carpet on the staircase between the ground floor and the first floor.

Probably the guy who was carrying the same in a carton could not find a place in the lift of the decent managers of Multinationals and to add to that his bad luck- the smaller lift designated to such backbone workers was under maintenance. Could he have waited till that got sorted? Of course "NO". Would it not create havoc in the MNCs if there were no sheets to take print outs of the e-tickets, Bank account statements and last one – some work related docs which people in vain plan to read while traveling? So he decided to carry it up using the staircase for one day because his life style does not need resolutions like mine. He missed his breakfast hurrying to work and when his strained muscles failed to support him further, gravity took over.

So what was happening now? He is picking it up probably 20 or 30 at a time, forming bundles of hundred and placing them back in the carton. What are the people in the queue doing? They are watching him do it and waiting for it to get done so that they cane move up the stairs. Some at the bottom decided to break the resolution for the day. Some at the top could not help but give in to the steely resolution of the people behind them in the queue. The speed at which the worker was picking up the sheets can be approximated as 5 seconds for picking up 30 which makes 15-17 seconds to reach hundred and then 4 to 5 seconds to bundle it and place in the carton. So for around 3000 sheets he was carrying it would take 600 seconds! That is 10 minutes. May be the people watching all this did not do this elaborate calculation. It would have been much faster if at least two more people in the queue had lent a helping hand. What we need here is not probably Maths, we need to be human to understand it. All of us were born as naked babies in a hospital or a house. The difference could be the hospital bill or the house furnishing. But are we not equal as God’s creation? Is it ego that stops one from going ahead and doing some work that is meant to be done by a Level 5 worker? Would one not have jumped and grabbed an opportunity to do something that someone two levels higher does? In my view a person who can do his work as well as those of ones lower than him in hierarchy with pride has a much better caliber than the one who sits at the top and claims that he has the right to order because he has the capability to handle the job at any level.

I go ahead and make my way 10 steps through the queue. This is the only place where I was not stopped from barging into a queue. I start picking up the papers and bundling them and I realize my speed is much lower than the one who did not have his breakfast. My 50 Rupees breakfast or the IIT brand mind did not help me here. Still I was happy I did it up to my ability. My intention to break the ice failed. All I got even after that was a couple of quizzical looks and a set of people who were busier on their cell phones not to notice it!

The Evening of Eve

2008-03-15T01:44:00.005+05:30

"Black and White" – Rating ** said the newspaper last Sunday. I did not give much thought to either the title of the movie or the rating that day. But today, when I started thinking, I realize it is not only about colors, God’s creation has always struck a balance – whether it is day and night, Birth and Death, Man and Woman. Did I say woman? That brings me to what I have been thinking about the whole day, nearly one week after the "International Woman’s day". Both men and women are God’s creation. It is a well known fact that they are different, their needs are different, and their roles are different. Where does the problem lie? The problem arises when we as individuals fail to take cognizance of our as well as others’ abilities and limitations. Why do I see so many women’s forum and councils coming up while I hear of men’s council only regarding sports? We all know that March 8th is International Women’s day. How many of us know that the first Saturday of November is International men’s day? Probably very few. What is the need to have an international day for women? When I posed this question to different women the answers I got were – "Because the rest of the 364 days are men’s days" - "We have been oppressed since ages and we need to rise now"-"Men have April 1st and we have March 8th". What were these people trying to communicate? This is precisely what I wanted to find out by attending a Women’s forum meeting devoting 4 hours of my time. If I could learn a lesson or become aware of so called "women-specific" problems, it would be worth it.

I walked in the corridors of a five star hotel searching for the venue of this meeting like I used to search for the train compartment in the last minute during my college days. This search was easier because the decibel levels act as indicators of gatherings of women. So here I am amidst women of age ranging from early twenties to early forties. So it was obvious that women specific problems would be a function of age and I got excited looking at the spectrum I was exposed to. This is how the forum meeting started – "Welcome to the gathering FREE OF MEN" and a wave of giggles traveled through the room. My expectations committed suicide jumping down a valley like Hrithik Roshan in Dhoom. That was shown in slow motion at least; here I could hear a THUD sound. "Is this a Women’s forum or an anti-men forum?" I thought and stopped myself thinking that it is too early to jump to conclusions. 15 minutes into the address that the head of the forum gave I started contemplating – "Am I very different from the other members of the fairer sex? Why am I not able to enjoy the *alleged jokes* or *gossips*?" I heaved a sigh of relief when I was assured that there are >1 people who shared parts of my experience. Is this session for bitching about men or development of women? Why do I see common needs of men and women in the agenda for women forum? Leadership skills need to be enhanced in both men and women. Both need mentoring. Both need to do good financial planning. Both need to have good health. By putting these as women-specific agenda, are we not widening the gap? I see more dissociation in the company than development. Are we not repeating the historical mistake by discriminating now in a different way? But whom do I shoot these questions to? After all I am also among those who do not want to take the risk of antagonizing the majority.

What are we trying to address by calling this meeting and inaugurating a forum? The women specific problems I can think of are –

Women have been assigned the job of managing the household and nurturing kids for ages. Now they are taking up an extra job which is perceived as "job" in the real sense by the world. That does not mean they resign their previous job. A woman will have to continue with the old one, probably she can have an assistant which could be her spouse or mother or the legal mother. Extra load means extra problems.

Strangely, maintaining the household has never been considered as a job because it does not have monetary returns. If it was considered as a significant contribution to run a house, we would never call only CEOs as achievers without House wives anywhere in the run for the title. It is human nature to pamper the ego by achieving great things, receiving rewards and recognition. Women are also human beings which is why they also entered the race in the corporate world. Women are taking this up by choice. Due to the extra load they do face more pressure. Bearing a child is one of the important stages in a woman’s life. She definitely more corporate maternity leave to take good care of her health, she needs more time to devote to the baby as a feeding mother, she needs cooperation from the company to take care of the baby till it is on its own. "

I don’t see this in the agenda though everyone talks about it.

Women are different from men physically, biologically and to an extent psychologically. When God did not create the two equal, it does not make much sense to claim equality too. Rather what each individual should be claiming is Opportunity and Rights Commensurate with abilities. Just because Kalpana Chawla went to Space, all women can’t. For that matter, all men cant too. Each individual has a set of unique abilities, talent and limitations. If an individual is not allowed to achieve up to his/her ability it is unjust irrespective of the gender. So what kind of woman rights are we talking about? It is not that all men or bad or all women are good. Men have their own set of problems to deal with. Let us look at the other side of the coin. Being a woman has its own advantages –

A woman can call it a day anytime; she will not be questioned by many. But do men have that luxury? If a man quits his job, he will be labeled IRRESPONSIBLE and WORTHLESS. "He is supposed to earn for the family". Actually if we look at it, it is an initial condition problem of distribution of load. The cart of home needs two M wheels – Maintenance and Money. Long then, job did not mean resting on a ergonomic chair with only two parts of the body working – Brain and the fingers. It meant roaming in the hot sun, lifting loads of weight and sweating it out more than the current day Gym. Commensurate with the physical strength of men and women it was quite logical then to distribute it that way. The Stereotype has just continued till this day though times seem to be changing pretty evidently.

How many times have you as a girl felt relieved or as a guy felt jealous when the Physical training sir gave 2 rounds as punishment to girls and made boys run 10 rounds in school?

How many times have you spent a minute appreciating the variety of choice women have in terms of clothing and accessories? Do the shopping malls have anything more to offer to men other than shirts, T shirts and a pair of trousers? Sadly they had to resort to earrings, chains and pony tails. :(

How often do we talk about the tax exemption or the favors we receive from people from various rungs because of the universal bias towards the eve?
It is just that women have the amazing quality of amplifying the lack more than have. I don’t deny that we have women suffering from dowry deaths, prostitution, and lack of freedom or education in the Indian society. But definitely corporate women forum meetings will not cater to those people.

We will not achieve anything by putting down men or boasting about our strengths. At the end of the day we are going to go back home and have a coffee with a father or a husband. It is wise to understand the composition of the universe and that men and women are like irreplaceable pillars of a building. We as human beings (Does not matter whether it is a man or a woman) should recognize the success rate of working together rather than secluding ourselves and fighting for nebulous rights.

Alas! All I enjoyed was the Vanilla ice cream! :D

Lessons and some beautiful lines from "Five People You Meet In Heaven"

2008-01-27T18:47:00.003+05:30

"All endings are also beginnings. We just don't know it tat time."

You will start believing this if you read the book during the same time as watching "JAB we MET" just like me. I think something has to end for something else to begin. Even when life ends the life at heaven begins is what is told here.

"All human lives are well connected. NO story sits by itself. Sometimes stories meet at corners and sometimes they cover one another completely like stones beneath a river."
"Death does not just take someone. It also misses someone else, and in the small distinction between being taken and missed, lives are changed. This is why we are drawn to babies, and to funerals."
"Strangers are just family you have yet to come to know."
"No life is a waste. The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone."

Well something prevents me from agreeing to this wholeheartedly.

"Over the centuries, courage has been confused with picking up arms and cowardice confused with laying them down."

I totally agree with this. I think real courage is in facing day to day small battles of life without losing heart. Courage is to take up responsibility when you not taking it wont be noticed. Courage is to tell the truth when you know it will harm your reputation. Courage is to make a promise and be committed to it than not making a promise at all.

"He felt as if a string had just shot from his heart and looped around her shoulders, pulling her close, making her his. He loved her more in that moment than he thought he ever could love anyone."

I think every person should be lucky to experience that one moment in life.

"Sacrifice is a part of life and not something to be regretted. Sometimes when you are sacrificing something precious, you are not really losing it. You are just passing it on to someone else."
"We move through places every day that would never have been if not for the people who came before us."

Fills me with a sense of gratitude for those who have contributed in small or large ways for where I am today.

"Holding anger is a poison. It eats you from inside. We think that hating is a weapon that attacks a person who harmed us. But hatred is a curved blade. And the harm we do, we do to ourselves."
"Love, like rain , can nourish from above, drenching couples with a soaking joy. But sometimes, under the angry heat of life, love dries on the surface and must nourish from below, tending to its roots, keeping itself alive."
"Lost love is still love. It takes a different form, thats all. You cant see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. But when these senses weaken, another heightens. Memory. Memory becomes your partner. You nurure it. You hold it. You dance with it."

Love is something that makes the lives of human beings alive.

Astrology

2008-01-14T00:20:00.003+05:30

Astrology-"the study of the movements and positions of the sun, moon, planets and stars, and the skill of describing the expected effect that these are believed to have on the character and behavior of humans". This is all Cambridge dictionary told me about it.

Being from a biotech background and working as an Analyst in the corporate world, how-much-ever unconnected the two fields may sound, I have no clue how some celestial bodies floating somewhere in the universe can decide how my mom takes the news of me having a boyfriend or my boss deciding my annual rating or for that matter Shahrukh Khan’s "Om shanti Om" being a hit. I was wondering about this sitting in a room in which patches of the walls tried to take a peek at me from behind the innumerable posters and banners that spoke high of astrology, depicted planets as deities and had tables representing the positions of planets which made me recall my practical notebooks of eleventh grade. I was there for a reason. It is not as strong as the previous sentence may sound. It is because my uncle took me there. :) We were treated as VIPs as my uncle is a long time friend of that astrologer who makes money predicting others lives. This gave me the chance to observe a lot of things based on his interaction with his other customers.

Customer No. 1:

A mid-aged man with a hangdog look complains about his daughter- "I sent her to college thinking she will become an engineer, but she has forced me to leave all my dreams about her and plead the parents of that guy who does not even come close to the imagination I had about the groom I would get for her. The problem is she is elder to him and my daughter has "Mangala Dosha". I don’t know how I could even go and ask them about it". Our "solution-for-all" guru says with a wry smile and know-it-all attitude-"Well, that does not look like a problem to me. Date of birth can always be changed and kundali modified to get rid of problems. In fact, why don’t u get the horoscope of the guy. I can tailor your daughter’s horoscope to that."

Wow, that’s cool. Marriage is reduced do a garment business. If we can change everything in the horoscope, why do we need to match them? These questions of mine may never get answered.

Customer No. 2:

An old man with lines on his forehead that speak about his unmarried daughter gets in with some pieces of paper out of which all or one may end up in the dustbin in the corner of the room after the astro researcher speaks up. "Sir, I have these options in front of me. Can you tell me which of these is the best match?" Not spending more than 5 seconds on each, he says. "Well, I don’t recommend any of them". That man with the same look on his face after paying 20 Rs.

Is this great astrologer so proficient to make that out in 5 seconds? Probably at his age the visual power itself will bring a delay of 10 seconds. Or may be he can make that out and it is just my limitation to suspect it. But how was he sure that those horoscopes were not tailored artificially for someone else? ;)

Customer No. 3:

This time it is a woman who brings the horoscope of her very successful son who has everything but is not getting married and is 35 years old already. She asks –"My son is 35 and is not married yet. "

What is the whole point? You should be handing over the horoscope and be asking that guy to predict the scenario with marriage and not be letting the whole thing out.

Our astro king brushes it off with a bombastic statement –" How is it possible madam? I see that Shani has become asthadipati and is higher to Budha who has been looking at mangala from 4th house."

Does that make even one iota of sense to a layperson? What is he intending to do here?

" He will have to visit a temple which is beyond the hills and the mountains and do a pooja there. I understand that he will be busy with it. Let me suggest something for your good. It can be done by someone like us. All you will have to do is pay us some 5000 bucks. That’s all. That is nothing compared to your son’s future"

Great. I got my answer.

I thought horoscopes describe the way things take their course. So can that be changed by doing what he said. Will Budha stop looking at Mangala? How will that happen unless you change it and reprint it?

Customer No. 4

A guy of my age is here finally. He wants to know about why he is not successful in his career and is burdened by debt.

Burdened by debt at this age itself?

This lead to the same kind of fuzzy description and the conclusion was to make the guy wear a ruby stone ring on his middle finger. "How much would that cost?" he asks wishing as much as he could that it would not be high. "15000. That is fine. It makes you conquer the sun" comes the answer and I see a total eclipse on the guy’s face.

A guy is burdened by debt and you make him drown a little more by making him spend like this. Is this astro king sure that it helps? Will he pay the debt if it does not help? Ah look at his hand. I could see all the precious stones on the earth dancing on his fingers. Does this guy have no problems in his life now that he has conquered all the planets and stars?

The guy is hesitant to go ahead with it when asked if they could call the jeweler there itself. Of course, commissions are an unsaid part of it. After a lot of –"Go ahead" and "Hmm, I need to think", the astro says with the same know-it-all tone –" Your horoscope tells me you are stubborn and you wont listen"

Then why the hell were they trying to suggest or advise?

The guy leaves the room with nothing changing in his life other than the fact that now his pocket was lighter after those ten 10 Rupee notes left his pocket.

After all this I am left alone for a whole day of pondering on many things I see in life. I do believe that there is a power which is the reason for how different lives take their turns, intersect, diverge and converge. But my reservations are about the claims of understanding that power in totality and making a business out of the claim. If someone could conquer the forces that affect our lives, why are they still working for the 100 bucks that the guy gave? If they knew what to do to earn well, why have they not taken over Azim Premji or Narayan Murthy? Given that I have spent only 24 years on this earth, I don’t know what is the absolute truth and may not come to know even after spending 80 years. But that does not stop me from penning down my views and things that make me put my thinking cap on.

Om Shanti Om

2007-11-11T22:49:00.002+05:30

Audience always look forward for the diwali festive releases which enter the theatres with a boom after spending astronomic amount of money on publicity and hype through various streams, so much that the courtesy list for the media partners and the list of actors in the movie match in number. October month saw promotional efforts of Saanwariya and Om Shanti Om reverberating throughout the country. This is an attempt to make sure that no matter how long the movies stay in the theatres, distributors can recover every penny they invest within the first few days. This is possible as far as we have the curious bollywood audience who reach the theatres every year forgetting all the anticlimactic claims of the past. Being one among them, I need to pen down my views on "Om Shanti Om" – the diwali release of 2007 J

Om Shanti Om!!! Is it a movie on spirituality? When did this paradigm shift happen in Farah Khan when her previous movie had every commercial aspect you could think of! If you exclaimed this way, there is no need for it; we are not new to naming movies after the names of the protagonists, are we? As far as Farah Khan’s spiritual inclination goes, she still sticks to bollywood masala commercial movies but with a difference. Now what is the difference? She has been successful in making a commercial film which encompasses almost every possible aspect that we have seen in our bollywood movies over the last three decades while making a spoof of it.

We have witnessed the exaggerated flow of a mother’s love described using all kinds of similes and heart rendering dialogues in every alternate Hindi movie –"Ma ka dil aisa hi hota hai" . Seems like we heard it in many King Khan movies recently too – Kuch Kuch hota hai, Kal ho na ho to name just two :D We may bend down our head in boredom unable to bear tear-jerking Mommy dialogues in any other movie but here we enjoy watching it when the scene is made to convey that it is boring to continue the same. Kiron Kher – the only elder supporting actress in the movie has carried the role well by making the audience laugh with her role of overacting filmi ma of Om Prakash Makhija. Did I say Makhija? Sounds unconventional and is intended to. It has been tactfully used to convey the nepotism favoring Kumars, Khannas and kapoors in the 70s where Bachan had to struggle to make his mark. It is tough to come across a movie which can include so many different aspects spanning 30 years of film industry. Whether it is the foul play of the hungry ones for power, money and fame or the aspirations of the struggling artists dreaming of becoming superstars or loopholes in the way movies are shot and projected or the path to stardom which is a bed of roses for star sons and daughters born with a silver spoon in their mouth; they have been portrayed very well with the required subtlety and impact.

It will not be an exaggeration if I say this is an excellent movie for the shrewd ones who can catch the implications and don’t get enraged when their favorite stars are at the gun point. Hardly any star has been spared from lampoon. Manoj kumar hiding his face in style, Salman Khan wearing a cap with "friend" and saying dialogues about rules of friendship , Hrithik Roshan flying as a superhero and jumping into a valley with his Dhoom lady love, Barechested disco of !!!hmmm!!! lost the count of heroes salman being the first one to come to mind, Stylish Rajanikanth’s action defying laws of Physics, King Khan himself for repeating romantic Rahul roles and in spite of that asking– "Rahul, Naam to suna hoga" –Why not ,when we have seen him as Rahul n times. Some common behavior in the film industry is captured in a comical way very much within the domain of the script. Gorgeous ladies of silver screen making clichéd remarks about their relationship with their on screen partners, men brushing aside rumors of homosexual behavior again finding shelter in friendship, Award functions where neck and neck nominees try to cover the pricked bubble with a smile, Taking pride as action heroes imitating action scenes from the other side of the Pacific Ocean to mention a few. It is surprising how a movie made as a comedy pulling the legs of the film industry has got the support of the whole industry coming on screen in this movie.

Coming to the performances in the movie, Shahrukh has delivered a good one except for some scenes where he overacts trying to play the cool dude of 2007. His effort to build the six pack shows on his face that looks leaner and longer now. However, his effort at 42 has to be appreciated. Deepika Padukone , an entrant to bollywood looks gorgeous in the 70s costumes. The effort taken to make her look like the Dream Girl of the 70s Hema Malini has paid off. In the scenes where she shares the 70 mm screen with Shahrukh Khan , she has the ability to make the audience face dilemma as to where to focus their eye balls on. Considering that this is her first movie, she has been good in carrying off the role well. But definitely she could have been better. But audience enchanted by her beauty will hardly notice that. Shreyas Talpade and Shahrukh look like buddies, that probably has come out as a result of the comfort they shared off screen too. Shreyas has done a good job as the tapori confidence booster of Om Prakash Makhija. Arjun Rampal fits well into the role of stylish, tall, dark and handsome producer of the 70s with grey shades.

The music of the film is good and has caught on with young people especially due to endless plug that has not spared even the advertisements for Shoppers stop. Dard e disco would not have made sense if you had watched Shahrukh dancing to the beats with sad lyrics without the previous scene in the movie. It is again pointed at item songs in the movies now a days that don’t fit anywhere in the story but are made just to act as a crowd-puller. Concept of Panchabhoot - Earth,Sky,Air,Water and fire has been incorporated in this song again which we last saw in Nayak-The hero. Main agar kahoon is melodious romantic song that will probably stay in the list of songs you will listen to while driving after the craze for Dard e disco comes down. This movie will go into record for bringing together 35+stars in the same movie. Guest appearances have become the element of surprise and fashion now days through which the film industry tries to prove existent or non-existent cordial relationships. And in case someone refuses to appear in a guest role, it makes news as a fight between the crew of the movie and the invitee for the guest appearance. It happened even with OSO when Amir Khan refused to be a part of OSO’s title song where 31 stars come together. This song of course is one of the most awaited songs in the movie. It is very much in the story and is not out of place where the stars are brought in just for the sake of it. Graphic technology used in the song Dhoom Tana must be really appreciated where Deepika gets to Dance with stars of the golden era.

70s settings and costumes are really good and for sometime you will forget that the movie is a 2007 diwali release. The film goes in a recursive fashion where Farah Khan is making "Om Shanti Om" in which Mukhesh Mehra (Arjun rampal) is making "Om Shanti Om" in which the character Ramesh is making "Om Shanti Om" and so on. J The movie catches your interest because of the humour almost till the end. It would have been better if some specific scenes were not shown many times in the movie just to convey that somebody is thinking about it. The scenes are well connected for which the editor must be praised. The climax of the movie was not so believable for the 2007 moviegoers. But the message was well transmitted through one of the dialogues that Deepika says in the movie -" When you can believe hero jumping from a tall building and landing on his feet, when you can believe a hero sole-handedly fighting 20 villians, you can very well believe the concept of reincarnation or the climax of the movie. The climax also changes the traditional theory laid by our own hindi movies that reincarnated souls get into bodies having same physical appearance. It might have been a cost saving strategy to avoid paying another actor or actress. Here Sandy is not Shanti and where is Shanti is left for you to explore!

It is a good thing about Farah Khan to introduce the whole crew of the movie at the end which she did in her previous film too. Otherwise probably some people who work hard for the success of the movie never get to show their face to the audience.

To conclude, it is a good entertainer and you will get the worth for your money. It is relaxing to laugh for 2 hours 45 minutes in a 3 hour movie. The more number of times you watch the movie, the more will be the number of subtle implications that you will catch. The movie is different and creative. Kudos to the crew of Om Shanti Om.

Happiness in Life

2007-04-01T16:38:00.003+05:30

Every person has a value and belief system which he or she follows. That is what is responsible for the way one behaves, thinks, responds and lives life. It is nice to pen down the philosophy I wish to follow in life.

Life is what happens to us when we are busy making other plans. Life is to live , to be happy. Being happy is the continuous and ultimate objective of life based on which we optimise our situations. There is no want in life as such. Decide to be happy and ur belief and confidence that you can be happy will make it a fact. Dont let anything to affect you in life. Be untouched by any external influence like a lotus leaf in a pond and maintain the internal state of happines. It is independent of what you have and what u dont have...who is there with u and who is not....what worked in ur favour and what did not....Happiness is just a mental state unaffected by all these factors. All that matters is that unshakeable decision to be happy whatever happens in life. The day you associate happiness with people close to u...with ur possessions and ur environment u r dependent on them. U may love people, care for them but ur happiness is independent of it. Everything in life is a bonus because u did not have anything when u came. When u look at everything good that happens in ur life as a bonus u wont go to a negative state when it is taken away from u...Accept what life gives u and be contented with it. Believe that whatever happens happens for the good. If not anything it has given u an experience. Enjoy the moments for the experience they give and dont brood over their absence. U can be happy irrespective of the occurences in ur life. Life is always lived above x axis because we started only from zero. People come and go, successes and failures are bound to occur but nothing in life should affect you. Life is never unfair to anyone. Nothing is under ur control. There is one supreme power which is making all the people play their roles and watching one nice show. Anything can happen the very next moment and so dont lose even a single opportunity to make urselves more happy. There is nothing wrong in beng happy. Ultimately what u should fear is only ur conscience.

Conscience is one good friend which gives u the same answer to a question how many ever years down the line u ask...Listen to ur conscience. Be clear in ur thoughts...There is no problem that is not surmountable. No problem can take away ur happiness from u if u decide to be happy whatever the case may be. Nothing in life is more important than life itself... Everthing about life can be summed up in three words---It goes on. We often start working towards wrong goals...we are always getting prepared to live but never living. Start now...Live a life...be happy... I think everything has been figured out except how to live....Only if u believe that life is worth living ....and it is worth being happy will u create the fact....

Accept people for what they are...Never categorise their qualities into good or bad....Understanding that a quality exists in a person is more than enough to be a good friend to him....At the end of the day in any relationship what matters the most is understanding and trust...Trust that the person will not act against his or her own conscience. Understanding and accepting the person for what is true. Doing such a thing will clear ur mind of all the cribs...all the ill feelings and make u a happier person.....

What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose to be happy. Problems are bound to come because without them life wont be interesting. They are only there to make u stronger and not get bogged down. Ultimately one thing is true, whatever happens life is not going to stop there. We never know what twists and turns are yet to come. If u want god to laugh tell him ur future plans. You can hope for something but never expect something to happen. When u dont have expectations life is a jolly ride becuse everything that comes ur way excites u. U never know what the purpose of an event is unless it happens. So accept whatever comes ur way because u dont know how it is good for u...May be better than what u would have wished for..... The central dogma in life is

Decision---->acceptance-----> Happiness

Life is beautiful in its own way...All it takes is an open mind to observe and enjoy the beauty of life.

Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna

2006-08-15T13:16:00.002+05:30

I still remember that day in my ninth class when there was hype for the release of Kuch kuch hota hai which had generated huge hopes in the audience of being a blockbuster. The fact that it turned out to be one is history now and of course any Karan johar movie now is expected to do the same. One thing you can be sure of finding in a Karan Johar movie is grandeur, lovely locations abroad, amazing costumes, some smiles and tears. This movie also falls into the same category and can be identified to be a Karan johar movie even by a person who does not know that it is one. The differences that you can find in this movie compared to the rest are the absence of a "sagaai " or a "karva chaut" song, a bold subject which is alien to the families that were seen in his earlier movies. It seems like Karan was experimenting to test the acceptance by audience in "kal ho na ho" by touching on issues of homosexuality subtly behind the facade of light comedy.

Gone are the days when the woman in the house was shown as sati savitri. The sense of independence that many women feel and want to feel now is nicely captured in this movie through the character of Rhea ( Preity Zinta ). It is a fresh change to see the heroine of the movie ( Rani Mukherji) listening to her heart and desires rather than having blind devotion to husband like she used to do spending years shedding tears or staying as a widow in the movies of 70s and 80s. The presence of three superstars of course adds more charm to the movie though the Bacchans who are portrayed as the cool dudes in the movie steal the show when pitted against a fussy and irritable character that is played by Shahrukh khan. Kiron kher who is present in almost every superhit movie now a days is given enough footage in the movie as the whole movie revolves only around these six people except for a few friendly appearances by other actors. Talking of such friendly appearances in a Karan Johar’s movie everyone in the audience knows that right from KKHH to KANK the trio of shahrukh, Rani and kajol has to be a part of the movie. Whoever among these does not play a lead role definitely appears in a song. And so did Kajol in a song that rocked the theatre with the Bacchans dancing for Rock n Roll. John Abraham and Arjun rampal have also made guest appearances in the movie which act as respite from the lead roles who are there throughout the movie.

The movie starts off with an introduction of the lead roles in a hyped manner which provides enough opportunity for the audience in the theatres to whistle clap and shout for their favorite actors and actresses. Especially the introduction of Shahrukh Khan goes on for about five minutes before he reveals his face fully. The FIFA Fever has not vanished yet and hence based on the time of release Karan Johar has made use of it to create waves of enthusiasm by introducing Shahrukh khan as the heroic football player. The first half of the movie moves at a good pace with both content and comedy. Abhishek Bacchan and Amitabh Bacchan fill the theatres with giggles through their crispy dialogues and cool attitude in the movie. We have come across Baby B doing that in many movies. But it is interesting to see Big B flirting with the fairer sex over a broad range of age from 20-60. Kiron Kher as usual comes across as a modern mummy with touches of her characteristic comedy. Preity Zinta who represents the independent, successful and career oriented gal has carried her role well though she has not got much of an opportunity to showcase her talents. Rani Mukherji has performed well as usual and Shahrukh khan’s performance also gives a clear picture of Dev Saran. While watching the movie you can’t crib about the performance of the actors and the actresses in the movie. Afterall all of them are well experienced and popular. Yet the feeling that the movie lacks something lingers on.

Though the movie has a storyline that is different from the ones that Johar and Chopras deal with, the screenplay does not live up to that. At certain points in the last few minutes, the pace of the movie lags behind. The background score typical of these movies that play the tune of one of the songs of the movie often makes it slow when the actors walk away from each other or look at each other for the first time. This is because they are shown doing these things in slow motion till the tune of at least two lines of the song plays in the background. The comedy scenes are not spread over the movie like they were in Kuch kuch hota hai or Kal ho na ho to keep the audience entertained. The last part of the movie seems slow and insipid due to lack of energy and enthusiasm. But whatever comedy scenes are present in the movie concentrated in the first half are very good. Especially, scenes of some confusion leading to dialogues with double entendre and attempts of Rani and Shahrukh to rekindle the romance in their lives which end up as fiasco. The character representation in the movie is one of the main points that make the movie less effective. The roles of Rani and Shahrukh seem repetitive and often remind you of roles that they played in Hum tum and Chalte Chalte respectively. Hence the freshness of the characters remains absent. The songs are a good mixture of both melody and energy. "Rock and Roll" as well as "Where’s the part tonight" are two songs that sweep you off your feet in a good DTS theatre. But the positioning of some songs like " Party song " and the title song are untimely with the former not going with the flow of the movie and the latter reducing the speed of the movie almost while nearing climax. The cinematography is commendable which has made every scene fit to be made as a poster. The scenes that show snowfall and dry leaves being carried by the wind remind you of some scenes from kal ho na ho.

The theme of the movie is pretty realistic as the same feelings that are experienced by Maya ( Rani Mukherji) in the movie can be experienced by many women of the married community. It is quite possible that the person to whom you get married may not be the one whom you can call your "soulmate". And what if you actually meet that kind of a person after marriage? That is a very possible thing to happen. How the relationships get strained and life changes is something that needs to be addressed to. But the strength in the topic is not found in the script. First of all there are not an instant in the movie that can make you actually feel that Dev is indeed the soulmate of Maya except for some common likes and dislikes. In fact, there are more instances of Maya being upset with Dev too which may diminish the difference between Rishi and Dev as far as Maya is concerned. Moreover the role description of Dev is not at all attractive which will probably make you question at some instant while watching the movie – "What is her problem in loving such a charming guy like Rishi ( Abhishek Bacchan ) ?" . This is because neither is Rishi portrayed strongly as someone whom Rani cannot be happy with or Dev as someone whom a married woman can get attracted to. It is understandable that Dev had to be shown as a failure which could create problems between him and Rhea. But looking at him limping throughout the movie with a long hair do that does not suit him often makes you crib about his appearance in the movie. To cut short the whole story and say in a few words, the presentation of the love between Maya and Dev is not convincing that makes us overlook the fact that it is extra-marital and wish that they should be together.

Some things that can be appreciated as different in the movie are twists like Rhea and Rishi deserting their respective partners when they learn of their affair; while you will be actually expecting them to forgive them and lead a happy life thereafter like ‘usual’ Hindi movies, Abhishek Bacchan announcing his marriage when you expect him to say "I cant live without you. Come back to me." Sudden death of Amitabh Bacchan and his advice to Maya to leave Rishi also seem unexpected.

Overall this movie can be rated as reasonably good for audience without much expectations of the hyped " Karan Johar Blockbuster" movies. It is a mixture of + and – points and what overtakes what depends on how much you believe in the theme as well as on how much you can relate to the characters in the movie.

Life as a teacher

2006-08-13T00:13:00.002+05:30

Everyday we realise certain things as life is a persistent and continuous teacher....The classes of life are more ruthless than any dean or academic administration of a institution because there are no holidays for lessons of life....This blog is just like writing notes for todays lesson.....

Human psychology has emerged now as a stream of study for people dreaming of becomming " doctors "....both in the real sense of medical doctors and also pseudo doctors who earn a phD....But I guess psychology is not something that is taught only in educational institutions....we dont get exposed to psychology for the first time in the class room like we do probably to Newtons laws....It is something that is communicated without a medium....u grow up with parents and siblings and without verbal exchange u can easily make out what is running in their mind.....No one teaches us how to do that....It is just like how babies know to drink mother's milk without any training.....

Sometimes some people are very sensitive and sharp for whom the others' thought process seems pretty transparent....This may make them good psychologists...but if thats not their proffesion, it is a bane in disguise of virtue....Thats because there is lot of hypocrisy in this worls......countless number of liars and pretenders....If u r a dumb believer of what people have to tell u....there is no disturbance...because what people usually tell u is more likely to be sweet, polite and atleast sounds favourable....But if there was some x ray machine that could decode the thoughts in their mind all that is said above may be disproved....So if u have the ability to somehow feel what the person is thinking or what his intentions are instead of what ur ears r hearing...U will face a lot of disappointment.....

For example lets take a hypothetical situation where u r in some serious crisis and in need of some money...U approach the person whom u consider to be ur very close friend and ask for help....If u r insensitive to invisible thought waves u will probably believe the reason that ur friend politely gives...and the disappointment of not getting the money will be covered up by the care that ur friend shows using wonderful words ....But if u r sharp to know what is going on in ur friends mind while he is saying those things....U r doomed to double disappointment....

So it is better to move on with life without thinking about the mental chaos of other people.....and better be happy with the flowery descriptions that cover up thorny intentions....In both cases ur practical situation will be same but mentally u will be obviating some extra disturbances....

To be happy one needs to learn to let go of many things....Nobody likes to be answerable to someone...and no one is answerable to u....no matter whether u think they r or not....so unless u let go of it....it will linger on only in ur mind and affect u.....Dont remember the bad things that others have done to u....because U cant reverse it and after all u did not do it....and also dont remember the good that u have done to others...because it is already done...moreover it will only make u expect returns in vain and regret the good things which will only devalue the highness of it.......

A Transformation

2006-08-09T22:11:00.002+05:30

I feel there is a right time for every activity, a right place for every incident to happen and a right person who has to be responsible for it and all this is predetermined..... At every stage each one of us learns lessons from failures, disappointments and even success for that matter....But it seemed like I only acknowledged the lesson, talked about it but never put it to practice in the situations that came later, the opportunities I had later.....I only realised today how hearing the same things that I knew already can make me feel the urge to do something I had not done....It was like studying in 10th again ( the one u have already studied and passed out) but this time with more enthu, more vigour and more energy.....I felt as if I am given a second opportunity to do something that I ought to do.....( though I never wanted to do it when the first opportunity arrived).....

Rain drops were being sent from heaven along with a message for me.....I stood there feeling the drops touching my forhead, my arms and often making my eyes blink in an attempt to stop them from entering my eyes...later i realised that they were in fact trying to open my eyes!! A voice from miles away speaking a few words that directly went and shook my mind, my thoughts and brought in front of me, my hidden strengths. The voice was penetrating only today of all the days and it said " U have so much in you.....U have the capacity to do wonders....U need to realise ur potential...stop depending on others either for emotional support or for achieving something....U have everything in u to do it urself......U need to realise that u have proven now and again that u have the ability to do well and succeed all on ur own.....Dont question others...u can find the answer urself......U dont need more than a few people who care for u which u already have......U need not be very nice to everyone....u cant impress everyone.....and there is no need....Ur life will be fine and in fact better even without the care of people u crave for.....U need not be afraid of failures...U need to face them with courage and self confidence...That is what will give u a sense of respect for urself...U need to place urself high in ur own opinion.....There is nothing wrong in being a lil selfish to stand high in ur own opinion...U need ot give urself more importance than for others.....U need to have something that u can give ur life for.....a passion...It may be ur favourite field of study..... a favourite art that u wanna pursue....U need to go higher in life and achieve gr8 things....U have everything in u to do all that....Do not compromise ur priorities for the sake of something that is not worth it......U can handle situations in a very mature manner.....if u want to.....it is just that u have never wanted to.....bring some changes in yourself and u will turn into a very fine mature lady.... Start now and look at problems as challenges u can face urself and come out of it and feel a sense of pride and love for urself......Dont let others use u.....U r ur own priced possession...u cant let it go waste....Let go of extreme emotions...dont try to hold on to things and people....The source of inspiration and enthusiasm for u should be internal......It is within u....."

These things written down will keep me on track to be a transformed independent individual......I realise that every individual is a beautiful creation of god....with amazing abilities to go ahead with life happily.....We should not underestimate this ability and let it go waste.....Say to urself everyday....." what is life if not for the challenges that u overcome?...so face it...be strong...I shall win"

My realisations

2006-08-09T11:44:00.002+05:30

Human mind is very dynamic and restless; especially mine which refuses to rest even when I am sleeping. It constantly fights to make its presence known through dreams when I am sleeping, imagination of situations and thoughts when I am alone and awake. Even when I am speaking to a person, the mind is working in the background simultaneously which is what is responsible for me having opinions on others. And often due to this continuous activity and generation of what we call thoughts, I travel to places I have never seen, solve problems I have never faced and may not face ever, experience circumstances which may never happen and realise stuff that has changed my attitude towards life, my daily life and behaviour.

The thought process of human mind is responsible for the changes we find in people and appreciate or complain saying " He is not the same now". Many people say that it is due to the environment, society and what not. But the necessary link in all this is the human mind. It is because of this that two people growing in the same house may be drastically different because they do not have the same mind and hence not the same way of absorbing , assimilating and realising things from the abovementioned factors. So i thought it is a good idea to write down all that I think when I am alone observing my surroundings, sitting in front of a comp, walking on the footpath and even when I lie awake on bed at nights waiting to get sleep....So all that follows is an incoherent set of realisations and thoughts without any continuity. The only link is that I have thought about all these things.

The belief in one single sentence can spoil a person's peace of mind and way of life. I have always believed..." Anything can happen anytime"....But it has made me so different from my peers. It makes me think of all the negative possibilities before going ahead with something and think of a way out of every negative possibility even before any problem arrives.... It never happens and all the energy I put in thinking could have been used for something else....I have been branded as a pessimist for doing that...But can a person be positive always....How can u be cautious without thinking of a negative possibility?....People say I am overcautious.....But when I want to do something really well first thing that comes to my mind is what if I fail!...The dreadful scene of me failing in it keeps me on my toes to work for success...Now can I call it as a pessimism leading to optimal results.....I know that there is a problem with what I do...But it is so involuntary....I dont make any efforts to think all this....My mind does not stop just like a clock ticking away.... But my point is why not take precautions against negative when u can?...and this will not happen if u dont have the ability to think of the negative possibilities....so this involuntary activity in mind has both been a friend and a foe to me......It does not allow me to sleep at nights......me lying idle on the bed think of my parents.....their old age ...their health.....my future.....my education....my health.....my friends future......and the list goes on.....and why is that I think of negative possibilities and spoil a peaceful sleep that the other part of the world is enjoying....?

Sometimes some sights can never get erased from ur memories and come back to u again and again ...... For me it is the sight from the corridor when I was walking on it in a hospital and I peeped into the wards......I started thinking....Old age is such a bane.....however strong people r in youth ...how muchever they fight for success and gain fame and name....this body is such a fragile piece fo flesh and bones which deserts the person .....once he is on the bed dependent on people who at that point of time are in his past situation.....life looks like hell.....his own hands and legs dont do what he wants them to.....needles pricking him all over his veins disguised as energy sources for his waning body..... all he does is stare at the activity of nurses and doctors and helplessly wondering whether everone has to experience what he is doing some day...... This sight has stayed in my mind and it shouts and tells me everytime.... Life is not a bed of roses....Most of the people experience what u r seeing.....be happy now that u r in a better situation presently.....but this positive feeling is immediately struck by something very harsh...." there is lot of age difference between u and the people who have been a part of ur life all this while----- ur parents , ur grandparents, ur aunts and uncles.....so u may see them going through these stages.....and that is not very far also"......I feel miserable that time as if I have no reserve of enthu left in me.....I go home and look at my parents and feel better.....I pray whenever I look at them..." Oh god! I dont wanna see all this with people I love so much ".....but is it realistic to pray so? can it happen?

There are always some situations where u realise that how many ever people care for u...how many ever people love u......you have to face it all alone and get out of it.....just like how u came to this world and how u r gonna leave it.....But I have one more belief that if u r brought to the entrance of something u will definitely exit that too....When the balance is maintained at the world level through borth and death.....it will definitely be maintained for a small system like the situation u get into...Given enough time everything falls to place.....If u look back and see all that u have cried for in your past---- may be a doll in nursery, a pencil in nursery, an exam in school, a friend in adolescence......It does not hold any important place in your present life.....U got into a problem and u came out of it...u got attached to something and u came out of it....so everything is a phase..... It is like waiting for the milk to curdle so that u can have sweet curd next day....

I sometimes wonder how my mind can oscillate between so many positive and negative thoughts...Is that called balance?....Life would have been good if everyone was open...there was no need to differentiate between what has to be spoken out and what not...who has to be treated formally and who need not be..... I dont know much about animnal society...but i know this thing for sure that there life is far less complicated.....All the complications that arise in our lives is just paying compensation for the intelligence that we humans have been endowed with.....No man is free...there is always something that holds him back......no person would have done everything that he wanted to.....but people who call themselves free would have just transferred the restrictions to their own minds and say that they are actually acting according to their own rules....the transition time is not accounted for.....

Love is a beautiful feeling but it is problematic when two people love each other too much also.....Issues of possesiveness, personal space creep in......or they think each of them understand othe other so much that there is no need to say anything that they used to...It slowly turns into " used to love each other ".....There is need to express.....it is something like a plant growing.....but do we stop watering a plant just because it has grown fully....?

These discrete thoughts shall continue......and spread to social, psychological and other fields in future posts......I shall stop it here now.....

Random Thoughts

2006-06-15T11:33:00.003+05:30

Usually I plan out what I am going to do next...But right now I dont know what I am going to type in the next few minutes...Recently I have started experimenting this out...I try to do things without planning to see whether they come out better, as my mind will be cooler and chilled out...last few months have been the coolest days in terms of my temper and mental condition...I have learnt to njoy smaller joys in life and not worry or peek too much into the future...I was impressed by the way some people live life chilled out hedonistically.....I have an appreciation for such people and their manners of managing life's routine activities...So i am trying to become one and appreciate myself too.....

Life is short yet we think and do things as if we will live forever ...we postpone things we can njoy at this moment and probably tell ourselves " right now let me struggle and once I reach position X I can do all these things in leisure....but when u reach position X u will tell the same thing with reference to position Z....Leisure is not something that will come in ur path...u need to move away from the routine path...take a break , njoy and get back reenergised.....But this does not happen because struggling for things somehow gets entrenched in our system due to what some elders teach us....now u r in school...Once u finish ur 10th and get a good percentage u will be a queen....u can do whatever u want....but that is not true ....after 10th ur next barrier is 12th....then ur graduation....My god where do we stop?.....obviously we cant ride a three wheeled cycle after finishing 10th!!

I have read this somewhere..." To live life fully u have to attend ur own funeral"....It has a lot of meaning...if u can imagine ur self dyign today u will realise what r the things u like to do and have never doen in ur life...and the thought that u cant do it again will be so unberable that it will make u do it...U can also imagine in ur funeral what r the things people will tell about u...have u been good to them?...could u ahve reconciled with that one friend u stopped talkign to...could u have been ncier to some people.....all these questions will improve ur way of life definitely.....

Life is a gift ...u need to live it the way u like to not succumbing to some immaterial pressures.....My thought process starts somewhere and ends somewhere else...This happens always...but I could bring out the point that life is to live it to teh fullest!!

Dreams

2006-06-13T13:08:00.003+05:30

Dreams !!....There may hardly be a night or two in my whole life ( tracing back its beginning to the oldest times that got registered in my memory and still remain...which mark the beginning of my realisation of existence of GODA ... I feel this is what a person feels his age is too ... ) when I got up in the morning or afternoon as I do most of the times now and dont remember what I dreamt of in my sleep.....Dreams make up an important part of my life.... In dreams anything is possible....I have experienced that everydaythere a lot of things that I see, I do and hear.....atleast one of these things is somehow represented in the night's dream.....Different ideas get amazingly linked in the dream....Some of my dreams have made me wonder at the presence of mind shown even in the dreams...

It was the night of Dec 31st , 1999.....I had intentions of waking up early ( once in a blue moon)....as it would be a special dawn ---- milennium sunrise!!...(I think I can change 'once in blue moon' to 'once in a milennium')....In my dream that night I went up to the terrace and waited eagerly to see the sun emerging from behind the trees and also watch nature's abstract art in hues of orange, red and black....But to my surprise the night sky became brighter and brighter and finally transformed into what I can call morning .....I could not see the sun.....I cant believe that I realized in my dream itself that I was facing the west like a moron....Then I actually got up at 5 30 after that dream....I went to the same place and waited for the sunrise this time facing east...but more than the sunrise, what lingered on in my mind and what makes me think even today is this influence of intelligence on dreams.....

I seem to have this beautiful control over my dreams....My mind is always alert even when I am dreaming....It is so realistic and very much related to my daily life unlike the accounts of dreams I have heard from my friends.....I have always been a dreamer....I imagine things and incidents that can make me happy and live in the false world that I build......If you venture to watch me without my knowledgewhen I am alone, u can often find me singing and talking to people in my false world.....though those people actually exist in the real world I give a totally new character to those people in my dream world......These people are always a part of my night dreams too...There are many things in life we cannot do because we r not the sole controllers of incidents that happen in our lives.....but dreams provide a medium to experience the pleasure we would get if things happened as we would want them to happen....U may wish to play see saw in a park even now.....but u wont....u r a grown up person and u would feel conscious to actually go to a park and play.....This is just an example...There are many things in our life we would like to do....but just because we r not " supposed" to do according to the people who make up our society.....So the members of the society just prohibit each other from doing certain things and indirectly raising the bar for themselves...A likes to dance on the road and B,C,D feel it is stupid to do so...So A does not do it.....and similarly what B likes to do may nto be approved by A C and D.....but in our dreams there is no society.....no one to tell u something should not be done....Dreams are nothing but the activation of certain neurons......so if u r playing see saw in a park in ur dream u can actually feel it through all senses....u can feel the iron seat ....the wind blowing against ur face ....and ur body experiencing the acceleration......( if U r an intense dreamer).....After all in both cases whether u do it really or think of it in the dream all ur body can experience is the action of ur neurons......

U can feel the touch of a person miles away......U can have hours of chit chat with people u wanna talk to.....In reality u may not even say ' Hi'...But in ur dreams they will be very compatible to u....because after all it is U controlling their behaviour with u too......so the dream world has lot more happiness, pleasure and satisfaction in store for u because....it is constructed by U....U r th creator.....

One of the things I enjoy most is DREAMING......DREAM DREAM DREAM......it improves ur mental helath by providing vent to ur feelings and frustrations....by fulfilling ur unsaid desires......and making u a more satisfied person....and someone has said..." Dream is the first step to succeed..." so I dont mean the night dreams only....every moment when u r working u r in fact dreaming of its success ...watching ur goal and moving towards it......Dreams form an important part of human existence...

The touch of gratitude

2006-06-09T11:06:00.004+05:30

A bank is a place where money flows in and out, customers come and go but occasionally some customers tend to develop good rapport with the officials in the bank and one such event lays the foundation to the story I am going to narrate. It is important to mention here that my father was a bank official who gradually started speaking to a customer who came to the bank every month to collect a $100 check. On one of my periodic mischievous ventures to the bank to do role play as the manager in his absence, I got an opportunity to listen to that customer who made me embody gratitude as the basic plus point in my character just by narrating his personal experience in a laconic way. And here begins his experience which is translated into a story as narrated by him….

"Seeing an old man who waits for the Government pension every month end coming to the bank to collect $ 100 check without fail, I am sure you have assumed that my son staying abroad and is sending it to me as it is considered a son’s duty to take care of his parents. But let me tell you, I don’t have children. But the story of this $100 check dates back to 1975 when I was still working as a Government clerk. I had gone to a post office to send a telegram to my sister when I saw a charming young boy at the entrance badly searching for something and I could make out from his facial expression that it was nothing more than a wild goose chase. But I don’t usually approach anyone and delve into their personal matters and therefore I carried on with my work. It is unbelievable that out of around 50 people moving here and there in the big post office that boy chose to come to me. I don’t look that social and approachable, do I? He came to me and said "Excuse me, sir". The voice was anxious and apprehensive, he seemed completely demented. I gestured vaguely that I was ready to listen to him as it is human to do so when a person seems to be in trouble. He continued speaking with his hands trembling in nervousness. It was making me believe that he had a genuine problem. He said, "Sir, My name is Ramu and I have just completed my B tech and I wish go abroad for my higher studies. I have to send the application today so that it reaches before the last date. I had 20 Rs in my wallet which I lost on the way. As it is closing time now, I will not be able to get the money before the time. I am really in a very helpless situation. Can you please lend me Rs 15? I shall definitely return it to you if you give me your address"

I am a skeptical person and don’t believe things easily and as the world is getting worse everyday I find it hard to trust anyone. Fifteen rupees was not a negligible amount at that time. Yet I thought for a minute. As the time was running out I decided that Rs 15 can be earned by me easily; if it is helping someone it is good to spend for such a cause and even if this guy is lying to me, it is fine as it is not a very big amount for an earning man. So I took out Rs15 from my pocket and handed it over to him. His eyes reflected happiness, unlimited joy, gratitude and hope. For that one moment I felt so good about myself for bringing happiness into someone’s life. And after that he pestered me to give my address to him and I gave it to him hesitantly. Later I walked out even without being vigilant to check whether the money was used for the purpose he mentioned.

Neither the amount nor the duration of the incident was remarkable for me to give persistent thought to it and I happily forgot about it. I remember to have doubted the genuineness of that guy a couple of times when I did not get that Rs 15 back. The incident was so evanescent that it did not occur to me even when I received an air mail about two and a half years later. I did not have any clue as to who would have sent it to me. I had no friends or relatives abroad. I opened the envelope eagerly and found a letter in a beautiful handwriting that showed maturity and good organization. I read through very fast at the end of which a tear or two rolled down my cheeks. It was the same boy who was completely erased out of my memory, the same boy whom I had considered insincere on not getting back my money, the same boy who had respected me and worshipped me throughout those two and a half years when he was doing his post graduate studies. He had written to me as soon as he had got a stable job. Believing that he remembered me was far, I could not even accept the fact that he had preserved my address which I had given him that day in the post office on a piece of paper that had very less lifetime left. I realized that he must have written it down in an important diary or a notebook with the intention of thanking me some day as that paper would not have existed so long. The very realization that he intended to be thankful to me touched my heart.

I felt like reading the letter again as I had just glanced through it in a hurry. Those words were so sincere and heartfelt. He had written,

"Sir, I am sorry that I could not return your money for this long as I had to make arrangements to leave after that day and was very busy with it. I am indebted to you throughout my life for the crucial help you did. If it was not for your kindness, I would not have been sitting here in this office in such an honored position today. I know that what you have done to me cannot be redeemed. Still I shall make my effort by being there for you whenever you need for whatever reason. You can count on me in any situation in your life. I am giving my Phone number and address. I don’t know anything about you, except that you are a very kindhearted person. I don’t know about your family, your financial status or your likes and dislikes. I want to do something for you for my satisfaction. If you give me your account number in a bank, I shall send $100 every month to you. Please don’t think that I am degrading you by sending money. I have a lot of respect for you. You can think of me as the small squirrel that did its share of work in the mega task of building a bridge for Rama in the Ramayana. It is just a small way of expressing my gratitude from miles away. If you agree to this please let me know.

Yours sincerely

Ram

After reading this letter I wiped my tears with a smile. I got an assurance that being childless is not a disadvantage as long as such people still exist in this world. And now you have guessed that it is the same person who sends me $100 cheque every month. The value of dollar may go up and down, but the value that I hold in his heart shall always remain the same. I am proud of myself for changing the turn of someone’s life by my small action and I am sure he too likes himself for being a grateful person. Such small things really make you feel good about yourself as well as others."

I listened to him with astonishment and I remember that I hardly blinked my eye. His story was really an eye-opener for me. And can you believe it? I have a small diary in which I have written the names of all those people whose little acts of kindness have contributed in changing the course of my life significantly. It gives me a sense of well being. I realized that day that acts of kindness and gratitude touch heart instantly.

The arms that cuddled with Love

2006-06-09T11:00:00.002+05:30

Now this is something I wrote long back for a Magazine but it was not selected...so I publish it myself here...

The arms that cuddled with Love are stretched pleading for the same...

"Blogspot" provides a platform to give lyricism to feelings and thoughts dwelling in the heart of hearts, to render the beauty of words to our contemplation, meditation and introspection. As an adolescent of fifteen sitting in a clinic where my mother had gone for a check up, I started deliberating on this issue. This whole contemplation was kindled by a few words written on a poster hanging on the wall. The words went like this-"If you think SOMEBODY is a burden to you today, DON’T FORGET you were a burden to that SOMEBODY in the past and you will be a burden SOMEBODY else in the future." These words made me think hard to decipher who that SOMEBODY was and it was only a matter of seconds and I realized that the person who said these words was referring to two people by "SOMEBODY". Two people who are indispensable for your whole existence in this beautiful world. They are the ones, who introduce you to the world by giving you a name, by giving you your identity. Mother is the one who carries you in her womb for nine whole months embracing every hardship that she encounters, every pain that she suffers from, absolutely for you to come to this earth. Your father is the one who holds your hand and helps you in taking your first steps, in bouncing back every time you fall learning to walk into the grand entrance of your life. The lives of parents change when their entire dreams and aspirations take the human form. Every decision they take thereafter is touched by you – the privileged life-affirming person in their life. They see their dreams live through you. The subtle sacrifices they make for your sake may go unnoticed several times but the fact that their love is the most unconditional is carved in stone.

It is very unfortunate that old age homes are filled with such "once upon a time" loving parents who spent all their life insuring their children against the forces of evil and the necessity for insuring their own life was expunged by their enormous love for their offspring. The same child who was the apple of their eye a few years back has orphaned them after growing up. I wonder how a person can hesitate to even feed the same people whose hands fed him in the past. The same people who slogged their guts out for his education, for his progress. Why does one kick the ladder after reaching the pinnacle? This is not an imagination as the large number of old age homes which exist are a proof of this. Why does one not realize that life not only evolves but also revolves like a wheel where the person at the top has to go through the stages where he too gets crushed between the wheel and the hard land? The glory days are ephemeral.

I have personally come across families where retirement marks the end of all happiness, freedom and respect for the parents. They are then doomed to depend on their children who consider them as burden and suffer humiliation and insult. They have to put their heads down which they had always lifted up till that point in life. There are instances where a father cannot even make a phone call without his son’s permission; a mother cannot cook what the current BOSS of the house dislikes. How can a person forget the reality of life that everyone has to go through every stage in life? When the parents never treated them as dependents earlier in life and instead made their children the prince and princess of the house why should they be a sentenced to a life filled with insult, sorrow and disparagement? Does money make man forget his responsibilities, his duties? Is the extensive world filled with cut throat competition where people are racing to outsmart each other shrinking at the level of moral values and sentiments? I fail to understand why a person who can support his wife and his children thinks twice before spending a hundred rupee note for his father’s medicine. The increasing number of nuclear families may be due to several factors like job opportunities in big cities, education, money etc but this escapism from responsibility towards parents is definitely a factor.

Parents are also human beings and as it is said "To err is human". Due to generation gap there may be issues on which the elderly differ, they may also make mistakes and be emotionally unstable due to old age. But all these are microscopic when compared to the amount of love they always showered on the pieces of their heart that they allowed to walk out by having children. So the younger generation needs to realize that there is no need for old age homes where humanity exists, where love exists, where responsibility, duty, sentiments and gratitude are given prime importance. Finally at the end of our lives when our entire life flashes in front of us we should rather feel proud about the way we kept the two important people in our life happy and not be guilty of making the people who loved us suffer. So I urge the youth to take an oath of being responsible and giving care and love that our parents deserve.